Of Blood and Water
by Godess Of the Nite Moon
Summary: Ginny stared at him, flinging the knife up and down... Ginny feels she needs to do something that would make her braver, make her stand out. But what she found was a bittersweet getaway. A personal story for me.inspired by AOS - Cat Scratches and Cuts
1. The Metal Blade

This was inspired by AOS- Cat scratches and Cuts. It's in my favorite file. If you have time, read it. It's a great story. Please, no flames, this comes straight from my POV. Thank you.

She sighed as she once again sat there on her brother's bed, staring at it. 'I wonder what Harry does with a pocket knife when he has a wand?' She heard laughing coming up the stairs. 'Oh no!' Ginny gasped. She quickly looked around her brother's room. Harry had come to stay with them for the rest of the summer, and every day, while they practiced quidditch, she stayed upstairs, gaping at it in pure wonder. It seemed to call to her. But never had she been caught. She ran as quickly and quietly as she could to her brother's closet. She slid it open, and left it open a tad for her to breathe.

"That-was-great...that catch I mean." Ron panted, out of breath.

"Yea, good save by you too. If I hadn't caught it, it would have gone at least 20 miles Ron! You're getting great!"

Ginny rolled her eyes. She did an impression of him. 'I can't believe I liked him, no wait, LOVED him' she recalled ' how could I have been so stupid?' Harry had gotten very impressed with himself. 'Of course, he is hot...and...' she glanced at it, sitting there. 'He may be good for something...' Ginny too had changed. She got sick of being the youngest. She of course, yelled a lot more, and did things like hide in her brother's closet listing to Harry and his conversation. She smiled at herself.

Just then, Harry reached for the knife. He flung it up and down, it reflecting in his glasses. Ginny got lost in the movement, then fell, making noise.

"What was that?"

"I don't know" Said Ron, getting up to go check. Ginny gulped and closed her eyes.

"Harry, Ron, Ginny, dears! Dinner!" Molly Weasley up the stairs.

"I'm starving!" said Ron. Their direction changed from the closet, to the kitchen. Ginny sighed and wiped her forehead. Harry slipped the knife in his robe pocket, or so he thought. It fell on a pile of Ron's clothing, not making a sound. Ginny sat there a minute, then recalling her thoughts 'he may be good for something...'

She smiled and slipped out of the closet. She picked up the knife and felt a wonderful power come over her. She quickly slid out of the room and into her own. Ginny looked at the knife, and flipped it out and back like Harry had done. Ginny was now 16. So much had changed since the Order Of the Phoenix. And so had she. Someone opened her door and she quickly put it under her.

"Ginny?" She was waiting for the worst, she was thinking of her mother saying 'What were you doing with that knife?' or 'Isn't that Harry's?' But all she heard was "Ginny, dinners on the table dear." She smiled and said "Thanks mum, ill be right down."

The smiled slowly vanished after her mom shut the door. 'Ball 2' she thought to herself. She sighed and placed the knife safely under her pillow. 'He stole my love and threw it away, I think its time I take something in return' she said, ' I'm letting the thrill getting to me. No wonder Slytherins act the way they do.' She went on down to dinner with a huge smile on her face.

"There you are Ginny, I've got to go help your father at work, make sure the boys don't get into too much trouble..." Molly winked at her daughter, then with a pop she apparated. She walked toward the table, as Ron wiped his face and got up. "Err, bathroom." he said, leaving Ginny and Harry alone. This, she did not like. "So" said Harry, Ginny's smile did not last. "Oh, another crack from the peanut gallery then? Lets hear it." Ginny said harshly. "Oh this is no joke. Its a question." Ginny opened her eyes wider and crossed her arms "You went kissing my picture again were you?" Ginny's face went red.

"Wha...o...." Ginny couldn't say anything.

The night in Gryffindor common room, she stole Harry's picture in 4th year. He hadn't brought that up since 5th year, in front of Hermione nonetheless. Harry had begun to giggle and snicker. "No, no I wasn't. And I'm sorry I ever did that in the first place, I was idiotic, and apparently..." She had never felt so brave in her life, wow, these words coming out of Ginny's mouth. Ginny's mouth. My mouth. She thought. "Apparently what Ginny?"

"And apparently" she continued

" I don't want to just be one of those late night girls that seem to so satisfy you in every way." Of course, this was one of Harry and Ron's secret conversations. This was Harry's turn to blush. Ginny looked pleased with herself and stomped upstairs, bumping into Ron on her way up.

She grabbed the knife and got in the shower. She saw the water droplets fall on and off the blade. She grabbed her upper arm, and started her first cut. 'Whoa, where did that come from? Ginny thought to herself. 'Hmm, that's a little too wimp like' She did a second over the first, a lot deeper. 'Yes, I did it. I feel all these emotions coming, and all the bad ones going.' she smiled at the knife and washed off the knife. She kind of felt like everything was going in slow motion. In one week she would be back at Hogwarts. Stronger, braver, and an all-new Ginny. She stared at the cut, blood kept coming out. She felt happy and got ready to wash her hair and go to bed.

This is just the first chapter; I'll have a new one up tomorrow...I think. The more reviews the better! Please, no flamers. Thanks.


	2. Devil on my shoulder, or angel at my sid...

Sorry bout the bad spelling. I haven't got a beta yet. thank you Noelle for a nice review. ) On with the story!

Ginny woke up the next morning and rolled over. She felt the burning of her arm and lifted up her shirtsleeve. It was still there, but now it looked like some ugly infected thing. Unlike the fresh one she saw last night. She pulled it back down, and thanked Merlin she had long sleeve shirts.

She got dressed and went down to see Harry, Ron and Hermione eating. 'She must have gotten here early this morning.'

Ginny found a spot next to Hermione and poured herself some OJ. Hermione finished the food she was eating and laid her hand on the spot where Ginny cut herself. Ginny cringed at this, but luckily Hermione didn't notice. "How's it going Gin?"

"Umm, fine." She lied quickly, looking at Harry who soon turned away.

"You want me to go grab you the bacon, I think the pan is almost done making it."

"No, I'm fine thank you."

"No really, ill go get some." Hermione leaned a little bit harder on her shoulder, this hurt even worse. Still, she held in her pain. 'Pain' she thought to herself. I guessed it surfaced in the blood. I...I think I like this." She smiled when Hermione got back with the pan. Feeling a little bit better about the situation.

"Thanks a bunch Hermione."

"No problem."

"Ginny, mum is coming to pick us up to go shopping for new books and supplies. She said to wear something that wouldn't make you hot under your robes."

Ginny felt a little worried again. ' I cant wear a T-shirt, it could easily ride up. Ill just say I had nothing to wear.'

"Oh, alright Ron."

The rest of them ate and went upstairs there separate ways. Hermione to Percy's old room, Ron to his room, Harry to the bathroom, and Ginny to her room.

Ginny left the long sleeve shirt she was wearing, and just pulled it up to her elbows. She knew her mom didn't have much money, and that she might not get new robes this year, but she couldn't take any chances. She couldn't get caught just yet.

Ginny put her hair up and slipped on her robes and went down stairs with the rest of them. 'Why am I always the last one to get here?' she thought to herself.

"Come on Ginny, your after Hermione. Harry, your after that." Harry nodded as Hermione stepped into the fireplace and said "Diagon Alley" Ginny stepped into the fire and did the same.

She walked over to stay with Hermione and wait for the others. It was going to be a long day.

Ginny stayed with Hermione while Ron went with Harry. Harry was talking very fast and pointed at Ginny. She figured he was telling Ron that she knew about the private conversation they had. She giggled and once again, felt that devilish smile spread across her face. She looked over and saw Fred and George's shop. 'Weasley's Wizard Wheezes'. Shed only been in there once, and maybe she could get something new from there.

"Hermione, ill be right back, ermm, hold this for me."

"Ok come back soon! This stuff is kind of heavy."

Ginny ran across the street and into her brothers joke shop. She heard weird music being played by what she thought was a rubber duck or horn. She went in and her brother, George, by whom she could tell by the scar on his hand. He had gotten it by being the test dummy on a new kind of pop rocks. The kind that can pop open anything.

"Hey Gin, you here to look around? Or did mum send ya in?"

"I was wondering, do you still have any of that Skin Coloring juice?"

"Sure do, what color, red, blue, purple?"

"No, the original skin color..."

"Skin color? Why that?"

"Ermm, I'm planning on turning the carpet in our dorm into what looks like skin, you know?"

Fred had came out and looked kind of puzzled. "Well, a joke is a joke, and since this is your first time."

POOF Fred was holding it in his hand. "You get it for free."

"Thanks so much!"

"No problem!"

"Tell your friends about who you were sponsored by!"

"Sure will" Ginny said bolting out the door.

'This will defiantly cover it up. I just hope it lasts me.

The days went by until it was time to go back to Hogwarts. She carefully placed the vile of Skin Coloring potion in her trunk, and the knife was carefully placed in a fake silk cloth and put down next to it. She brought her stuff down and off they went.

The time to get there was quick. She saw all the old face, all the new ones. She could tell by the height and panic-stricken faces of the first years. She told her mom goodbye and stepped onto the train. She walked into the compartment with Harry, Ron and Hermione, always as usual. She felt like such a follower. 'I would have sat next to Luna, but I didn't see her anywhere. I'm not in the mood to go looking. I just want to get this over with.'

Harry begun feeling around in his robes.

"Hey Ron?"

"Yea?"

"Do you think I left the knife at your house? Its not in my robes."

" I didn't see it anywhere. It must have fallen out."

Ginny felt a little bit of a sick feeling come over her. She was not used to being the quote on quote ' bad girl '. She was used to being the one who had to be saved, the one who couldn't brave it out. But now, she had to learn. Ginny told herself repeatedly that he deserved it, and the sick feeling slowly faded away. Ginny did admit to herself that the rush to her brain made her feel more alive, and that maybe if she got used to it, her other senses would increase, be more precise and daring.

She slowly fell asleep. She dreamed she was at Hogwarts in a battle with Harry. She had cuts all over her arm, and every time she hit him, a cut would split open. Ginny moaned every time this happened. She actually liked the feeling. They both stopped and Harry noticed what was on her arm. He went over and kissed her, making her bleed even more. She did not like this feeling. She pushed him away; she was bleeding more then ever. More people gathered around her and noticed her cuts. They were pointing and staring. Then, everything about her glowed black and red. She screamed at the top of her lungs and everyone disappeared. She woke up as Ron shook her awake. "Come on, we're going to be the last ones off. I've been trying to get you up for hours!"

"Let go," she said in a mean way.

She got up and got off the train and went walking toward the carriages.

'Another year, another life, another beginning.' She said to herself, as she had said every year since 2nd year.

A/N ok, again I'll try to get up another chapter soon, please review! Thanks!


	3. Blood Filled Drain

After the sorting ceremony, she followed the hall to her dorm. The usual laughter of the Gryffindor's, remarks of the Slytherins , whispering of the Hufflepuff's, and the dropping of books from the Ravenclaw's. Ginny shot a short-but-sweet smile at Luna, and continued on her way.

A gloomy sort of expression filled her face as she entered the common room.

"Hey Gin, is everything alright? You were kind of quiet at dinner." She wanted to answer her brother so badly with a ' How could you notice, wasn't Hermione distracting you?'

"Yes, I'm fine. I going upstairs to take a shower ... or something." Leaving them all with blank expressions.

Ginny made her way to the top of the stairs, and turned into her room. She saw her trunk, in front of her bed, which was the one at the very end. She smiled widely, as now she had more choice of skin ... to release the pain that was. Her robes were Ron's old ones, as he had Georges now. They were a little bit big. But that's good, very good.

Ginny opened her trunk to see the fake silk cloth around the most wonderful thing she had ever encountered in her life. Her stuff a bit ruffled, but she didn't mind.

She took it in the shower. She washed herself and her hair and whatnot. She sat down and let the water fall onto her. She took the blade to her arm, and let it slide. She couldn't count how many times she did it. It wasn't a big deal, until the water stated to hit them, and she realized where they were. The water washed the blood off her skin and into the drain. A red river flowed from her body, to the now blood filled drain. She felt so happy, and again felt that power. This was becoming a sort of ritual for her.

Ginny walked downstairs, to see the annual 5th year and up 'welcome back party'. They started this tradition about 2 years ago. And all the 5th, 6th, and 7th year Gryffindor's where here. Beers filling their hands that people had smuggled in, charmed bears, a few other things floating around. Music played in the air, it was a charm of course. There was a silencing spell on the portrait, and ones on the two doors for those who were sleeping and didn't know about the party.

Ginny looked at the people around her, and saw one boy in a hood. He was putting bears into his robe, and then he started to leave. Ginny ran quickly and stealth like up the boys dorm stairs. She grabbed Harry's invisibility cloak, and went back downstairs to follow the hooded man. She was in for some adventure tonight'.Wow that was easy, who knew?'

She slipped out the portrait just in time to see the man head down the corridor and turn. She followed him quickly. It was dark and a little hard to see things. She went to turn the corner and...'ouch!' She ran into one of the statues, ripping her robes on the arm she had most of the cuts on. The man put his hood down and turned around, obviously hearing some noise. He made his way father down and she followed him. She could see he had blonde hair, and he was headed for a portrait with some symbol...and is that a snake? 'Uh oh, its the Slytherin common room.' She thought to herself. She walked further toward it, and was finally in front of it, but where did the ... "AHH!.. mrffa weffaarahrmm " Someone had grabbed her and covered her mouth! "Gert orff me!"

It's been a long time I know. I'll have a chapter up after I get out of school. I hope you like it so far, please review! Thanks.


	4. No willpower?

"What do you think your doing down here...Weasly." Of course, Malfoy was standing in front of her, holding her against the wall.

"I can do as-I-please thank you. Now get your sick hands off me!"

"Trust me, I didn't take any pleasure keeping them on you. Now why the hell were you following me, there's got to be a reason, what? One of the spies for Potter now?"

"I can't believe you would mention...him. The asshole that entered my life. Why in hell would I spy for him?"

"Oh so now he's an asshole. Get your feelings straight Weasly, and don't follow...me...anymore. What are those on your arm Weasly?"

"Nothing, and why should you care."

He let out a laugh as he pulled of the rest of her arm robe.

"NO! You bastard! Give it back!!" he held it up in the air with one arm and grabbed her with the other one.

"You? A Weasly? You cut yourself?" He continued to laugh.

"You better shut your mouth you low life inconsiderate snail of a pure blood, your nothing more than a rich BOY with lots of daddy and friends help. You don't deserve to be here!"

"Since when do you care about pure bloods or mud bloods? Weasly, why you're so grown up now." He said in a childish tone.

"What do you know? And why were you in the Gryffindor common room?"

"Its none of your business, but if you really want to know, I was scrounging. I needed some stuff, and the room of requirement is being guarded by Filch. And I think I know why now, you had...this."

He pulled out the vile of Skin Colorific Potion.

'Awwww, crap. That's what was missing. I'm in deep shit."

"I think ill keep this."

"Give me back the arm off my robe, and give me back my potion, NOW!"

"No, I happen to like them both. I think ill keep them as a souvenir. Of the day you were caught."

He snickered and folded the bottle in her arm robe.

"I've taken enough of this bullshit from you!" She whipped out Harry's knife and pointed it in his direction.

"Oh, I'm so scared. I'm shaking in my robes, oh someone help me, not the knife!! Ha, even I thought you could do better than that Weasly."

She let out a grunt and stuck it back in her pocket. Ginny walked up as close to his face as she could get.

Ginny begun to spoke in a sort of shaky voice.

"Why the hell do you need to take half my life away from me? I need that potion. Let me just have this, and you can call me whatever. Just let me have this. Be nice for once."

"Those are nice words of wisdom Weasly, but here are some for you. You have no will power, and tonight, I'm not going to either but...you have none what so ever."

He begun to walk away, she ran up to him and pulled up his sleeve, he quickly pulled his arm away.

"You hypocrite!!! How can you accuse me of having no will power, when you do it too!"

"I have a reason, you don't have much of one."

"Excuse me, your not the only one with problems here, I have my own reasons just as well as you have yours."

"Hmm, I guess, your right."

Ginny stared in wonder, did I hear him correctly?

"I'm sorry?"

"I guess your right. Drink?"

He pulled out a beer bottle and handed it to her.

"Umm, thanks?"

"You probably wont get more than that from me now. Don't think ill just be nice to you for this."

"What about my...?!"

He walked through the portrait not turning back.

She threw the bottle at the portrait and the snake hissed. She put the cloak back on and went back to the portrait of the fat lady, who was sleeping soundly. You wouldn't even know there was a party going on inside until you fully went past the portrait.

There was Ron and Hermione snogging of course. What else would they be doing? She brought the cloak back upstairs, and quickly left; people were in there doing things she didn't even want to know about. She put her one arm into her robes and ran quickly upstairs...only to be stopped by...you guessed it, Hermione.

"Ginny where you going? What happened to your robes? I can fikikx them with a fickikik...fikikik" She was clearly to drunk to say Fixing Charm.

"I'm fine, go away, let me be"

"Ok fine, if you don't want the cat ill sell him to ya."

She had never seen Hermione this wasted in...well...ever! It was kind of funny. But still, she needed time...time alone.

A/n I know this wasn't the best chapter, but please please please review. Ill try to have a new chap up soon. But the next one might be long, or I might split it in two. Ill think bout it.luv ya and thank you.


	5. It made me an Individual

Screams this was a G!!! I didn't know! I'm a ditz! Thank you so much for telling me! I owe ya one.

I am a little bit of loneliness a little bit of disregard

Handful of complaints but I can't help the fact that everybody can see

these scars

I am what I want you to want what I want you to feel

But it's like no matter what I do, I can't convince you, to just believe

this is real

So I let go, watching you, turn your back like you always do

Face away and pretend that I'm not

But I'll be here 'cause you're all that I got

I can't feel the way I did before

Don't turn your back on me

I won't be ignored

Time won't heal this damage anymore

Don't turn your back on me

I won't be ignored

Draco sat up in his room. He was head boy, so he had his own room. Big bed, lots of gadgets, stuff here and there...knives of all sorts. He even had his own personal house elf. He was of course, the badass of the school. Although, he had that perfect hair preppy side once in a while.

While thinking things over he moved around the room, putting things in order.

Even though he was 17 it seemed like old times. He still had a bit of growing up to do. His new age seemed to be taking effect. Although he was a slightly different person at home. Draco kept things to himself, having lots of emotional bodyguards. No matter how bad, or how good he felt. He wouldn't let you know it.

It was just hard to open up. After being kept down from doing that. Since he can remember, cutting was the only thing that he could let his emotions out. Till this time, no one had known, Pansy didn't know what they were, but Blasie might have known.

'Little Weasel talks too much. I think ill put this to potion good use. Damn bitch had to look at my arm. I wonder if she saw my wrist. Oh well, if she tells anyone. Hell will be served.'

------

Ginny was pissed when she went to bed, she couldn't sleep. 'Dammit, where my knife. WHERE IS IT!!' she screamed in her head. She felt around on the floor, and found it. She brought it up to her legs, cut, slit cut , cut. Not knowing what she was doing really. Just kept cutting and cutting. All she could think about was pain. Emotional pain. 'Thirty seven, hey that's a record.' She pulled the curtains around her, and slept on top of her covers. It was hurting, this was good to her. It meant it was working. The emotional pain was a lot harder to bear than physical pain. And that's exactly what the knife does.

Although Ginny went to bed peacefully, but she didn't sleep soundly. She kept waking up once in a while, kept thinking people were going to find her out. ' I guess ill have to deal with it' she thought. Ginny put the covers over her. 'Its bad enough Draco knows. I don't need people from my own house knowing. I have to live with them.'

Ginny slept soundly the rest of the night...or so she thought.

"Ginny! Wake up are you ok? You were moaning in your sleep like you were in pain!"

"Oh, sorry, I'm fine. Bad dream. Sorry to disturb you guys."

"Umm, ok. Well breakfast starts in five. Get ready Gin."

Ginny felt very tired and confused. She had to force herself out of the bed and quickly put on pants. She felt very grouchy. Ginny felt as though she wanted everyone to leave her alone. She felt like she was freaking out. Anyone that bugged her, she would tell them about it. Oh, would she tell them.

Ginny put on some black nail polish that she had from last Halloween, it looked cool against her slightly pale freckled skin. She wanted to make a statement, be who she's always wanted to be. No more little quiet Ginny. She brought out an old black shirt of Ron's, and some old torn and poorly dyed black jeans. She would still be her in her own way, just...well...her true self now. Some people call it a stage, others call it a life.

A lot of people stared at her. She knew what was going through their minds as she entered the Great Hall. ' Fake, It will be gone before tomorrow.'

Ginny went walking between the Gryffindor and Ravenclaw tables. Hermione turned around.

"Hey Gin, saved...a seat."

Ginny walked right past her, then turned around abruptly.

"Oh, I don't think ill be using it as much as you too. Ta ta..."

Hermione blushed as if she and Ron had been so discreet about it. Ron spit out his pumpkin juice onto Neville.

"Umm, you both know, she's kind of right. Its like every 5 minutes with you two." Neville said wiping his face off.

"What's Ginny's problem? She's been acting like such a ...twit..." Harry said, as he watched her...silently walk away. Even though in his mind he had to admit she looked good, all that black did something. It made her look bolder older. He watched her hair sway and... no wait. This is Ginny you're talking about. Miss. Damsel in distress help-me-Harry. Hmm.' He listen to his thoughts a little more, and once more began to eat.

Ginny walked off without ever looking back. She went over and sat with Luna and a few old friends she had been mindlessly neglecting, and started off a conversation. Ginny didn't even bother to look back at some of the blank expressions or confused expressions anyone had. They didn't care.

Luna was always weird in her own way, but that's what made her cool. Amille (a/n uh - mill ) would cause trouble, but oddly got high marks in classes, and knew almost as much as Hermione. She was also known to be the smart alec and crack a joke and be sarcastic a lot. And then there was Ginny. She hadn't had very many individual qualities before, but to just walk around behind them, talk to them. Now, she was the Goth.or so Ginny figured she was now.

They all just chatted away, and glad to be back to old times...well, they made on NEW exception.


	6. New thoughts, hopes, dreams

Ginny sat down on her bed, with her wand glowing.

She begun to write:

Wow, a new me huh? This seems so new and yet all too old. I guess this is the way it's going to be from now on. Guess what? Draco...

She realized what she wrote, quickly scratched it out, and began to write again

Malfoy, cut himself, like me. We are totally opposite people. He's rich, I'm poor. What, is it not enough from him that he has everything he wants, and I have everything my brothers HAVE HAD. I wonder what his reasons are, if he has any. I wonder if he's doing it to get attention. I did see something on his wrist, but why would he need to kill himself? I mean, come on. Its week, and I know I am too, but for him? He always seemed so strong and assured, and yet asking so many questions. Well, I better get to bed. I have classes in the morning.

Ginny put her scroll down; she didn't have enough money for a real diary. She was saving it for well, something else.

She laid her head on her pillow, and drifted off to sleep.

Ginny was drowning, who would save her? 'WHY CANT I SWIM! What's going on?' She looked down and saw Draco, dead. She screamed in the water. His eyes opened, and color returned to his skin. He swam up to her and lifted her up. She felt light and happy. He took her to shore, and as soon as he laid her down, he fell over and lost all color. He was dead again.

Ginny cried and tried to wake him up.

"I need you, I need you. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I need you, my love!"

She fell on him and cried onto his robes. She felt a kiss on the check, and happily looked down at his face. He was smiling, but somehow, she knew he was still dead. Ginny put her hand in his, and curled up next to him, and slept. But a strange voice echoed in her head.

'I've been dying forever, dying forever...'

Ginny woke up quickly and rubbed her head. She could remember every detail.

'I kissed him, what was that voice? Why did he save me when he was dead?'

Ginny was so confused. She was a little bit weird ed out by the fact that he kissed her.

She felt so odd. Like something new was going on. She was a little bit worried.

Draco passed her in the hall. Ginny quickly looked away, she felt embarrassed. Like Hermione last night.

Ginny couldn't concentrate in any of her classes. Luckily, the only person that gave them homework was Snape. But that was the usual for him.

Ginny didn't talk much the rest of the day. The only time she really talked the most was at lunch and at dinner. She felt lost. In need of answers. The only thing she knew right now was that there was someone waiting for her upstairs. Her friend, the knife. It was a little unsharpened. She wished it could be a little sharper. For now she had to deal with it. It was still doing its job anyway.

'Maybe I could find some sort of spell.'

Draco sat up in his room.

'Weasley was acting really weird today. She acted like she did something and was guilty. But to me? What the hell is going on with her? She has a loving family, I don't, maybe just my mom, but still. She has people surrounding her everyday. All I have is a house elf, and my blade. The rest of it doesn't really count as family. Mostly just things to keep me busy.'

They bother were in an in depth thinking mood. They were both quiet, and that meant something good to Pansy.

Rumors.

"Hey, guess what? I heard that Draco was kissed...or more...by Ginny WEASLEY! YES! A Weasley! Don't tell him you heard it from me, I'm just passing on what I heard."

Pansy wanted to get him back; she wanted him to ask her to marry him. Cause 'they' loved 'each other'.

Pansy walked up to Draco's room and said the password.

"How did you, why are you? Huh? Pansy, what do you think your doing in here?"

"Nothing, just wanted to check on you..."

He knew what was going on, something wasn't right. Pansy was up to something...

"Get out Pansy, NOW!"

"Ok fine ill leave."

She left the room, leaving Draco puzzled. He just went back into his daze.

Pansy snickered at what she had found.

"All I need to do...i'll make him love me again."

A/N sorry guys, its been a while. Some stuff has been happening. And school has kept me busy. High school rules, but it is very tiring. Review please!


	7. Past Present Future

The rumor spread around the school quickly, as would any rumor. Especially about someone well known.

Of course Pansy (a/n thank you for spelling it correctly for me!) was as happy as ever.

'As soon as everyone knows, he'll get back with me, because he would need me to distract the people who know, and to show everyone he doesn't like Weasel! This is going to work wonderfully!'

Of course, if Pansy had half a brain, she would know that Draco had sources. Very good sources...to tell him who started the rumor. so Draco knew pretty much what she was doing. The only reason she was so infatuated with him, well, should I say Draco's money more than him.

The fame, the fortune, the glorious life she had only hoped for. Even connections with Lord Voldomort, she would be able to hack off anyone she though unpleasing. Pansy had even started to name their kids.

'With my good looks and his, ill have the most beautiful, and strongest children ever! Magical wise...'

She had so many plans in mind, she blocked out the big picture. Draco didn't like her, or anything at all about her. Draco knew this, she knew this, Pansy just refused to believe it.

-----

"Ginny?"

"Harry, don't scare me like that! What the heck do you want?"

"Umm, what's all this about you kissing Draco?"

"Kissing WHO?"

Ginny remembered her dream, and blushed. 'But it wasn't a real kiss, right?'

She mumbled to herself "It was just a dream"

"What?"

"Nothing. And no, I most certainly did NOT kiss Malfoy."

"Mmh hmm. Ok well I better be going."

"What do you mean by that you little twerp! Get back here!"

Harry just walked down the corridor, disregarding Ginny.

Then someone tapped her on the shoulder, she quickly turned around and almost screaming said "What NOW?!"

"Having problems?"

It was Draco.

"Umm, just remembered, gotta go bye!"

He grabbed her arm.

"No wait, we have to talk."

"Talk? About what, there's nothing to talk about!"

"The cuts on your arm, the dreams you've been having...there's plenty to talk about."

"Will you SHUT UP about that, seriously. What do you know about my dreams? They were just dreams anyway. So with that said, goodbye."

Ginny walked away, just as Harry had. Ignoring Draco's yell.

"I know Ginny! I KNOW!"

She ran fast down the hall, not turning back.

'He wouldn't know...what happened. He couldn't know.'

She tried to stop herself from crying, but there was no use. She headed for the closest place, the girls bathroom. In other words, Moaning Myrtle's bathroom.

Ginny dropped her books, and fell to the floor, crying out all she had in her.

"Oh look. Did someone make you fell bad. Well welcome to MY world! Being tormented everyday. This stupid bathroom of memories. What was it now?"

"Myrtle it is NONE of your BUISNESS!"

"Well if your going to have an attitude like that, I suggest you leave my bathroom. But by your red eyes and runny nose, I'm pretty sure you wont be leaving anytime soon."

"I can't tell you Myrtle. Its my problem. I have to deal with it. Just don't ask anymore questions , please."

"Alright then, Just shut the door on your way out when you go. The last people hear left it opened, and everyone could see inside. I know their making fun of me! I know it!"

She dived into her toilet, splashing water everywhere around her. Ginny looked into the mirror. It was kind of scary being here again, after what happened. That was when she got all those feelings, those urges to do something about the pain. She didn't know what at the time, but she did now.

'I wonder if he does know. How could anyone know? Besides her and.... well Draco wasn't even there. Yes, he made it up, He doesn't know about it."

Ginny wiped her face off with her robes, and walked out.

a/n Hey people! Thanks for all the nice reviews, Well, except for 'blah' whoever that is. I've got plenty of people who like my story, and you need to grow up...jerk. Anyway, I'm not going to waste my time on him. I think I know who it is , but anyway, you all rock for reviewing, ill try to get a new one up by next Monday or something. So in the mean time, REVIEW! Thanks!


	8. Love hurts

"Even though you're still living When you wish you were gone Is the greatest accomplishment that I'll ever feel? How are you supposed to get through life? Just by living day by day? So everyday I stay here Is another day I cry I don't know why I can't just leave I don't know why I can't stay For some it's just so easy I wish I could just be numb My lives on the brink of destruction And yet It's the best it'll ever be Or ever become."

Ginny had been writing so frequently, it seemed that everything would come to her. Thoughts flowing onto her ink quill, and then dripping onto the paper like waterfalls.

It was almost like she was falling into the paper. This was her first escape. It was still one of her favorites of the two. She only had two. Which is why it was one of her favorites.

Ginny stopped and looked down. It looked like a whole bunch of scribbles to the common person, just notes. Ginny knew though, it was just another 5 minutes of a clean escape. She didn't have to worry about being caught writing.

She still had what she wrote, that night.

She didn't write ABOUT it, just what she felt after.

Ginny reached into her trunk, looking around. She pulled out 2 pieces of parchment. As she read, the thoughts came flooding back to her. The party, too many drunken people.

'I don't even know if he remembers. This would explain his attitude toward me every time we meet.'

Over the summer, when Harry came back to visit, horrible things started to happen. Everything changed so dramatically.

Parents had left, friends over, alcohol.what else were teens supposed to do right?

Ginny didn't even want to get involved. She just sat back, and watched every one of them make fools of themselves.

She went upstairs, without looking back. Ginny sat on her bed, and looked at the ceiling, ignoring the sounds from downstairs.

She saw the door creek open, and the shadow stand there. AS he stepped into the light, she saw it was Harry.

"You scared me, I ."

"Be quiet Dud. IM tired of you, always getting in the way. Now get out of my room!"

"I'm in my room, so why don't YOU get out. Sheesh. You people need some GET- UP Elixir. You people have no clue what's going on."

"Oh, you're a girl."

"Yea, and when did you recognize this?"

HE walked over and kissed her. His breath tasted like sour candy.

She pushed him off her.

"Get off me you sick perv. Get out of my room!"

"Don't touch me like that."

"I was about to say the same to you, now get O-"

HE pushed her against the wall, and started to chock her. Ginny moved further, and further up the wall. She kicked to get him off her, but nothing worked. Harry held her up with one hand, and reached into his pocket. He held it to her neck, and right above her chest, he cut one long line with one swift move.

He let her fall, and left the room, she wanted to scream how mad she was, she wanted to cry at ho much it hurt, nothing came out.

She just went to the bathroom and tried to stop the bleeding. Ginny got a shirt, and tied it around the wound, onto her back. It stayed in place pretty well. She felt tired, so she laid down and slept.

Ginny snapped back to reality.

Since then, she realized why some people said love hurts. Even after that, she still kind of liked him.

She still could feel the scar. He also had slapped Hermione, but she wasn't as drunk as them, so she remembered. Hermione told him, and he apologized. They vowed never to let him get that drunk again.

Compared to what he did to Ginny, nothing had happened to Hermione.

Of course, the vows were broken. There were many other times, things happened with Ginny getting beat by Harry. She has actually been quite scared of him. And every time it happened, she wished things could be back to the way they were.

But her biggest question at the moment.

Was how Draco knew

And above all,

Why he cared.

HELLO! There was supposed to be more, and my keyboard isn't working (I'm on my moms comp), and I wanted to get his up quick. Thanks for sticking with me, ill try to have a new chapter up later.


	9. You've killed a part of yourself

Ginny awoke in a daze. Her odd dreams still filled her mind as she tried getting to the bathroom, and clumsily tripping over her shoes at the end of the bed.

She dragged herself up, like many times before and walked to the bathroom.

Things were pretty quiet. It was a Saturday, most were sleeping in. Ginny would be usually too, but she didn't want to risk having more nightmares.

She splashed some cold water on her face to try and wake herself up. Ginny's thoughts wandered back to her dreams.

She was awake now.

They were quite scary, and some were...nice. And actually, they were about Draco. About 'The Enemy'. Maybe that's why she liked them.

'Like her would ever think about me. How in heck did he know? Maybe he has some sort of magical tag on Harry that sees what he does...ugh its too early to think about this. Its still dark outside...'

Ginny walked out of the bathroom and looked at the stone clock on the wall. It was 5:30. No one was awake. Breakfast wasn't until 7:30...she had a lot of time.

She got herself dressed in the usual old hand-me-down clothes. Its not like she cared anyway, she had no one to impress.

Her thoughts of love brought her back to Harry, and all those times. Even though its not him exactly hurting her now, it was his knife that's hurting her now.

Ginny didn't find herself attractive in any way. She always felt that Harry liked her at one point, and that's why she was sort of happy, but now she knew.

She looked in the mirror, and faced a red haired, freckle covered, small chested freak of a person. She would stand there. Looking for something to make her feel pretty. But nothing did, so she stood there, mesmerized by nothing.

She wished she could somehow think better of herself.

Maybe someone could help her.

Someone could tell her she looked pretty.

Or tell her she was smart

Or funny

But no one ever did.

So she was stuck, giving compliments to herself. The one she liked best was, 'I don't look TOO bad today...do I?'

It was just the end of summer, so the floor wasn't as cold as it was usually. She walked down the stairs, where she found Harry, laying on the couch...with someone else.

Ginny just sighed and walked out of the portrait.

The air was clean and the sun was just showing a bit of a glow through the windows.

No one was in sight. Except, maybe a ghost or two. She figured she would go see Hagrid, he was up pretty early.

She stepped outside and down the grass hill to his hut. Pondering, wondering...

Ginny looked out to the forest and saw Hagrid's hut glowing.

She looked over to the side, and stopped.

'I hope I'm just seeing things...'

She moved closer to the forest, and saw it again. Ginny froze, to scared to see what it was.

It moved out and stared at her.

It was a bone horse with wings...

"But...but..."

She stuttered out loud...

'I thought you could only see those if you saw someone...die! I haven't seen anyone die! There must be something wrong with me! Am I still dreaming?'

She ran back up to the castle, not even looking back.

Little did she know, that a stranger was watching her.AS she drew nearer to the castle corner, she saw the man that was leaning on it. It was non other that Mr. Dragon himself.

Draco Malfoy.

"You see them don't you?"

"Ye...yes."

"Well who did you see killed?"

"No one."

"Ah, I see. Well, then you've killed a part of yourself. That's why I see them."


	10. Just thinking

"What do you mean I've killed a part of myself? I'm still alive aren't I, I'm not dead.im."

"Will you calm down!"

"Huh?"

"Calm down, your freaking out! Did that horse scare you? You obviously killed A PART OF yourself. Just A PART. Like your conscious is a part of you, or your self-esteem, you confidence. Those are all parts of yourself. Just because you can't see them, doesn't mean their not a part of you. Now, do you get what I'm saying?"

Ginny was now a little calmer; she doesn't know why they scared her so much.

"But they.and I."

"You're too scared to face it Ginny, I know. You're a smart girl, you can figure this out. You're just too nervous. It's looking at you. right in the face, just look into its eyes, and fight back."

Ginny didn't know what to think. He was giving her advice?

"Just think about it."

He said she was smart? No one has ever told her that before.

'Well if I'm so smart, why am I always the one getting rescued, not the one rescuing myself?'

She pondered this for a while, and looked up. He was gone, and people were staring to come out of their common rooms.

She sighed, and looked at the forest. It was too gone.

Luckily she knew she wasn't crazy. Someone had been there to tell her she wasn't. Someone explained it to her. She could have figured it out, she knew she could have. She was just scared. But he was there to explain everything, to calm her down.he had been there for her. Comforting her in her time of need.

This was not Draco's usual style of approaching these kinds of manners. She figured that he would have just laughed and walked away. Like all the other times before. Something was different about him, but not only the way he acted toward her, but also the way he talked. And the way he was actually becoming mature.

But you could still tell there was a certain part of him that remained. He wasn't one to follow the crowd and suddenly become everyone's favorite pall. But he did want attention.

Draco lived the secret life at home. The way his father spoke to him, the way he was treated. He still doesn't know why Snape had liked him. After all, he is his father's son. Maybe he.and she. weren't the only ones with secrets, hiding in the back of their mind.

Ginny stood on her side of the table, pacing back and fourth. Thinking. Her friends arched her with a raised eyebrow, wondering what was going on.

She finally plopped down on the bench and put her hand to her chin. She saw her friends staring at her.

"What?"

"What are you thinking about Gin?"

"Nothing."

"Well your thinking of something because your head looks like its on fire."

Luna giggled at Amille's joke.

"Ok ok, it is something."

"Well what? We already knew that part!"

"Come on Gin."

""Please"" They both said in unison.

"I'm just thinking. You know, about life, people, things, homewo--"

Amille grabbed her arm and pulled her down.

"OW that hurt!"

"Fire breathing dragon throwing daggers this way!" said in a rushed voice.

Ginny looked back and say Draco looking her way, then Pansy turned his direction.

'What is that girl up to.' she thought.

Everyone started to leave for their classes, and no one paid attention to Pansy drop something into Draco's pocket, just strong enough to hold, and just loosely enough to fall out at the right time.


	11. I didnt do anything

They proceeded to their classes. Draco going the opposite way of Ginny. Potions with Snape. Its not like he minded, he got away with everything.

He sat in the back as usual. Watching Potter and his group of the Fab 3. He had always been jealous of him. That's why he resented him. Even though he was truly green on the inside, he was always just normal on the outside.

Draco always hurt people with words, and only got violent when he needed. Which most people didn't expect form a Malfoy. But why would he save her and try to kill her. Its not like she would do anything anyway, she's Ginny! The one who everyone thought to be his girlfriend. Ha.

'What a drunk.' He thought.

'Wow, I'm sticking up for Ginny? Hmm. This new Ginny I can comprehend with. Maybe she's not as bad as people make her out to be.'

Draco had always made fun of her family, and her brother. His dad put her through hell and back. He wondered why he never liked her. I guess, another thing he was too afraid to admit would be the fact that they had a loving family. Something he never really experienced. He had so many things to think of, while snapped blabbed on and on. Mixture this potion that. He was passing so it didn't really care if he passed this or not.

Ginny sat at the side with her friends in transfiguration. Her favorite class and her highest grade. This was the only class she really got with them. Her other classes where either with the Slytherins or the Hufflepuff's. She didn't mind Hufflepuff, but Slytherin kind of made her feel uncomfortable. It reminded her of Draco. That wasn't the person she really wanted to be thinking about.

They all knew who she was and what she had done in her first year. Talk about first impressions. No one really talked to her in her other classes. She was usually quiet. Her teachers would smile at her and her would smile back.

Where did she belong in society? She hung out with the 'geek' and the 'class clown'. She didn't see them in that way though. Ginny counted on them for everything. To help her out. Except for one thing only. And she and Draco were the only ones.

Draco...heh.

She smiled at the fact that she had kept it a secret from her friends, who knew her inside and out. But the enemy who knew rarely much about her knew. Even though they were only one year apart, it seemed like a huge gap. 16 and 17.

They were so much alike yet so very different. Her friends nudged her out of her daydream and she began writing notes with the occasional slip away from reality.

Draco got up in his char and walked over to get the ingredients. Goyle hadn't been paying attention to the last 5 minutes of instructions.

He began picking up ingredients when he felt someone tug on his shoulder.

"Umm, drop something? It looks a bit small for you, why did you have it?."

It was Ginny's robe arm.

He grabbed it away form Neville, but not in enough time because Ron had seen it.

"Hey, that looks like one of my old ones. That's my sisters! "

Everyone's attention turned to Draco. This indeed was news. Pansy smiled triumphantly behind the crowed, then switched faces to an 'Oh how could you.' face.

Draco didn't know what to do or say.

"I knew it! You did do something! What did you do to her?"

"I didn't do anything. I fond it a while back."

"Oh yea, and you decided to keep it in your robes for safe keeping?"

"I don't know how it got in there, stop talking about things you don't know."

"I know perfectly well! You are defiantly going to regret whatever you did to her!"

"CHILDREN! SCILENCE!" Snape yelled, but Ron disregarded the message sent across by Snape and threw a spell at Draco.

"I didn't do anything." He got out with all his strength.

Had he done something?

'I think I'll keep this as the day you got caught!' Draco remembered that day.

I guess he had done something. But nothing like what her brother was thinking.

"Come with me. Weasley, NOW!" Snape grabbed his arm and dragged him out of the room.


	12. We need to talk

Everyone stared at Draco as soon as the door slammed.

He wasn't used to feeling like this. Everyone staring at him. He usually liked these occasions. But this time was different...much different.

Draco didn't even feel the courage to speak up to anyone. He was surrounded, lost, confused. Will everything he had so greatly worked for come crashing down? He would have to at least divert it.

"What are you all staring at?" Just glares

"Huh? Don't you have anything better to do with your time?"

Harry stepped forward and crossed his arms.

"Isn't this odd. He doesn't want to be stared at."

"Come one Harry, your making things worse!" Hermione whispered.

Draco finally got up. His arm was bleeding and his robes ripped.

"Maybe you can sew this one back onto it." Harry took the arm from Neville and threw it at Draco.

Draco had the strongest feeling to just beat what ever could be left out of Harry, but he held back and walked out of the room.

Ginny looked behind her for a second and saw her brother being pulled by Snape.

'What did the idiot do this time.'

She began writing again and turned back around for a second to see another shadow on the wall. Ginny could see it go past once or twice. Luna looked back and smiled at Ginny, shaking her head.

"Who is it?" she tried to whisper to her friends.

"Who do you think it is?"

"WHAT!"

McGonagal looked up from her desk.

"Do you have something you would like to share with us Miss Weasly?"

"No."

"Then perhaps you can go back to working on you project."

"Yes."

Draco stayed outside the classroom door until classes got out. He grabbed Ginny by the arm and slipped her a note then went on his way.

Ginny stuffed the note in her pocket and decided to go back to her dorm.

"Umm, guys, i'll uhh, see you round."

She ran off without hearing them ask why or even say bye.

Ginny walked quickly to her room, only to see Harry and Hermione waiting for her. The reason she could tell was they were glaring at her, and that only meant trouble.

She grasped the note tighter in her pocket, as if protecting it from their laser vision eyes.

"Ginny, we need to talk."

Ginny's heart started to race.What was going on, she could barely breathe. Things went in slow motion as she said those words. Did she look ok on the outside? Could they see right through her?

"Cut the crap Hermione. Ginny, we need answers, and fast."

A/n i know its been a while, but there was a fire at my house. Basically everything in my room was burnt, including my beloved computer. So I'm sorry for the inconvenience. ill try to get to computers as much as possible to update. Not very many people i know have a connection to the Internet at the moment, and if they do, i don't have a way of getting to their house. I'm at my dads house ATM so maybe ill write another one for tomorrow. Please review and ill get back as soon as i can.


	13. Mind Candy

Ordinary Ordinary

She was just ordinary

She was plain

But was she? She was ..No she wasn't

She was different. Not like any other girl. But treated like dirt. Unlike any other girl. But that's not the justice she wanted

She wanted something else. She wanted to be her. No one could see that this was the real her they have been premanently blinded by lies that the truth seemed... too unreal.

Sure maybe now she liked a boy named Draco. When before she didn't. So now it cant be possible? Just because the boy she liked before hurt her, doesn't mean this one will. He wasn't all that of a bad guy...maybe. He hurt he mentally more than physically. He wasn't aware of it at the time... right?

As Ginny continued to decide truth from fiction, the rest of her family and friends were worry free. No one knew. She was safe in her own train of thought. Almost as if she floated to some distant place she so much longed to be...away. From here.The ordinary world.

She lived in a place of magic and spells, hopes and dreams...but something was missing. Not only there but in her mind and heart. somewhere the pieces fit, she just needed to see the picture to finish the puzzle. But who could help her now?

Slashing her arms everyday just seemed to make things better. Just like a drug. The first time it just gets better and better. Then it hits the bottom. You get back up for that one second, but it drops you further down.

Its the easiest way out. But the hardest to deal with in the end.

Sure people had their problems just as much as Ginny had hers, but it wasn't all the same. Floating in her mind, she fell asleep. Dreams again

She was laying on a cloud, with people bouncing around her. "Come on Ginny!" they all screamed. The were moving so fast, but she seems so slow. And as she ran faster they became farther away. Their voices as if they were right next to her, but she couldn't somehow get to them. It wasn't a bad dream, nor a good one. It was an odd sort of dream, the ones you just cant get over.

You cant see your breathing the summer time. But you can feel it. You know its there. You just don't know how.

a/n I just got the Internet back, I'll be updating like a crazy. So sorry about leaving you guys behind, don't worry, I'll catch you up! And if you haven't seen me update , you can just IM me if its been 2 days or so. Okay. Thanks


	14. Eye Candy

So she was walking in the halls, when you know who comes around.

Her last class and she somehow couldn't avoid him.

She could see him on the inside, and it showed on the outside.

For a moment, she was out of breath. She had seen him so many times before.

He could see her, she could see him. But with just a little more vision than the rest of them. Like her dream, she felt a little in slow motion.

She walked passed him and felt him near. She closed her eyes. She didn't want someone else to break her heart, but she didn't know that for sure. Why was she giving up? Or was it more like heartbreak insurance. You've it happen before, so you know what to do next time...almost. Nothing is ever really sure. She wished she were one year older; she would have classes with him. Sit in the back and.ogle his every move like every girl with a fantasy? No Ginny, not you. You're not like them.

But is it different? I mean, for her and them? They don't know him like I do. Do I know him fully? Most likely not.

She just sat in her potions class and listened to Snape drone on as usual. 'Just hide, and look like your doing something.' She always read the books the night before to know what to do so she wouldn't have to listen to him.

Was Draco another little schoolgirl crush or something? Well, he could be. I mean come on....

Draco's in the mind of almost every girl in the school. Hermione admitted to her once of liking him at some point in time. I guess she confided in Ginny because she was the only girl friend she had. She couldn't tell these things to Harry, and certainly to Ron.

So who was next in line?

Ginny.

Its not like it was a bad thing but.... Ginny wasn't so great at these conversations. And she didn't like much hearing about her brother...I mean he IS her BROTHER. Ron was the youngest in the boy's so yes, they got along a little, but not as much. Ron wanted to go out and do things with the boys and not spend so much time with his 'little sister'. That certainly would not be cool.

But still. She endured listening her. She didn't want to make things seem bad. Its just that...hmm. Who knows?

She had dreamed another day through class. Luckily they were just note taking. She would copy off of someone later.

She left the room with a heavy heart. She felt sort of depressed. She didn't know what to do. Her brain was arguing with her heart. Of course she knew well enough no guy could ever like her. Especially Draco. Maybe he was just another fantasy. Maybe some of the things he has said could indicate something...maybe on another planet.

She just sighed and walked down to the library.

Draco was sleeping on the bed, talking in his sleep.

Luckily, it was only Blasie who came in the room.

"Umm, psst, Draco?"

She came in and shut the door.

He started mumbling in his sleep.

"I just wanted to take my knife back...hello?"

"Ginny Weasley."

"Yea, what about her?"

She walked over, and saw his eyes were still closed.

"Oh, you're dreaming."

"Gin.... ny.... Gin?"

"Umm. I better wake you up before anyone hears you. Merlin knows we don't need any more rumors from the drama queen."

She shook him over and over.

"Draco...DRACO!?!?"

"WHAT!!!"

"Your talking in your sleep again, be careful."

"Oh. Why are you here anyway?"

"My knife?"

"OH....oh yea. It's over there. Now let me sleep.... mrff."

He rolled over and plopped his head into his pillow. She grabbed the knife off the dresser and began to walk out the door. Just as she was bout to close it, she heard him talking again.

"Run Gin run!"

Blasie sighed and put a silencing spell on the door.

"Sleep tight."

Ginny's head was drooping. She had to catch up on everything. She hadn't done any work in class because her mind had been elsewhere.

'Its cold in here. Maybe if I just...take off my robe, I'll stay awake!'

She put it on the chair next to her and began reading again.

"So as Pilhilahn describes, the new breed called Mukker Weed...has...been..."

Ginny plopped down on her book, and went to sleep.

She was way to tired to even bother to wake herself back up. It hadn't occurred to her the danger she was in.

"Oh forgot my potions book...where did I leave it?"

Hermione.

"Ginny! Ginny what are you doing? She's out cold. Well at least she's studied her notes for once."

She went to tap Ginny on the shoulder when she noticed...her arm.

Hermione lifter it up and turned it around slowly, looking at the white and pink dashes with a few scabs on her arm.

'What's going on with her?'

"Ginny, Ginny wake up. We need to talk."

A/n Hey guys! The next chapter will be up Sunday, so keep an eye out! Thanks for all the support and for sticking around so long. Anyway, I hope to hear from you!


	15. Bitter Meetings

I sat there, still pretending to be asleep.

She rememberd the last time.

"Ginny we need to talk to you..."

"No you dont, get away. I don't want to talk to you, I want to go upstairs, and that will be the end of it. OK!"

Then she stormed upstairs...she got away this time.

She thought that moment was so scary, she thought they would have found out about her and Draco.

But now...oh now was a different story.

"Dammit Ginny get up NOW!"

She got up, pushed back the chair, grabbed her robe, and went for the door. Hermione grabbed her arm and pulled her back.

"You stop!"

"Excuse me?!"

"What the hell are these? Did Draco do this to you?"

'Oh...my...Merlin...that is the worst thing she could have said. What, did Ginny not look brave enough to have done it to herself? That she would have to be subjected to more pain after what Harry did?

All Ginny could do was stare at her with her mouth dropped open and her eyes narrow. She didn't have anything to say. She felt she had been smacked across the face by the lowest life form in the universe.

"Let...go...of...me...."

Ginny threw her arm down and went to the door again.

"DID HE?!"

"NO YOU IDIOT! You may be SMART but your not that BRIGHT."

Hermione just stood there as Ginny stormed out of the room.

Ginny walked down the hall. She felt like crying, she held it in as much as she could but it all came out. She turned her walk into a run and went as fast as she could to her dorm.

Nothing could have hurt her as bad as that. What in hell was her problem? How could she have gotten caught so soon? Things were going so well. All good things must come to an end.

"Ah! Watch...it. Ginny?"

Draco watched as she pushed past him and down the hall she went.

"Great. Now I feel like chasing her."

He ran close behind her, and yet he couldn't catch up.

"Ginny, wait! HEY!"

He finally caught up with her.

She could feel him grab her arm, and all she could do was fall to the floor. She had no energy, no strength.

"Ginny, don't make me carry you."

She raised her eyebrows and got up. She stopped crying for the moment and dusted off her robes and wiped the tears off her face.

"Why were you..."

Draco could hear Hermione's voice. Ginny's eyes widened and she turned to run again. He grabbed her and pulled her into the shadows. Draco covered her mouth, Ginny pulled his hand off and looked up at him again with confused eyes.

He pretended he didn't see her and held her back in the shadows.

'Umm, some dude is holding you in the shadows. And I'm not trying to escape.' She felt she could say she almost trusted Draco. She scooted herself further back, just to be sure.

"Ginny! Where are you? Come one Ginny!"

She felt safe there.

He felt protective.

Hermione came running right past them and didn't even bother to look where they were.

Ginny smiled and let go of her lip which she was biting.

"Come on, my room isn't to far from here. You can hide out there for now."

Ginny didn't know what else to do or say, so she nodded her head and followed him. - 'I watched you change

into a fly

I looked away

you were on fire...' - She didn't know why she suddenly felt like this. He turned to look at her and her body tensed up.

Draco saw her get nervous when he looked at her. He actually smiled back.

'Wow something's wrong here Gin. something is definitely wrong.'

They turned the corner and next to a small portrait. He traced the outlining then said something.

Ginny knew she was blushing. For some reason she could feel it.

The wall moved up and a staircase was before them. He motioned for her to go in first.

'The brute has MANNORS?!"

She started to walk up when she heard a voice yell..."Draco!"

They looked at each other.

Ginny held her robe next to her heart. She could feel it pounding.

'What do we do now?'


	16. A Slyherin's Room

Ginny crouched in the shadows as much as she could, as the girl walked closer to him.  
  
"Draco, you never usually use your back door."  
  
"Well Pansy, maybe you just never see me use it. Now if you dont mind, I have to get going."  
  
"No wait! I just wanted to know, if it was true. Are you with Ginny Weasley?"  
  
"Listen, ive told you once, and NO I am not. And my buisness is my buisness, and none of it concerns you anymore. Even if I was it wouldnt matter to you so just blow off and take your crap somewhere else!"  
  
Pansy took a step back, with her mouth droped open. She turned around and went storming down the hall.  
  
Draco shook his head and gave a crooked smile at Ginny. She smiled back even though he probably couldnt see it.  
  
He came inside and taped the door so it would close and lit his wand so they could see.  
  
They both began to make their way up the stairs, Ginny following close behind. The stairs were twisted as a spiral, and were not to long. It took them only about 2 minutes before they reached the door.  
  
Draco pushed it open and went inside to light the torches on his wall. Ginny slowly enterd his room and tripped on a trunk that was on the floor, but caught onto the desk next to it.  
  
"Careful. I dont use that way often and I dont bother to move those things."  
  
Ginny looked around the room, as the torches lit up, one by one, revealing the dark secrets of his room. Ginny stared in awe of the knives and the ancient peices of times thousands of years passed. His bed was huge with 4 posts and a cover on top. It was a dark green, for Slytherin she was guessing, and four pillows.  
  
"This is a great room!" She felt herself blurt out. She didnt mean to, it was mindless.  
  
"Its ok, but its not the best. The best thing about it is the solidtude. No ones around to bug you all the time. Except when they learn you password and come in uninvited."  
  
Ginny smiled and just stood there. It was kind of weird being in Draco's room, let alone a Slyherin's room. It was just something she figured she would never come across. It would probably take a while for it all to settle in. What was happening, how she ended up here, why he wanted to help her.  
  
"You can sit down if you want. I dont have any chairs, so your going to have to sit on the bed."  
  
Wow. Ok umm now she was going to SIT on his bed...in his room....on his bed. She knew it wasnt going to lead to anything, but it felt weird. She stood there, trying to think things over.  
  
"Ginny?"  
  
"Uhh, right...yea."  
  
She slowly went over and sat down. It was really soft and at least ten times more comfortable then her bed. She felt the covers and they felt clean and soft too.  
  
Draco saw her hesitation and he couldnt blame her. Her figured he knew how she felt to be somewhere different than her normal point of direction.  
  
Ginny could feel her eyes drooping. It was probably 12 midnight and she never usually stayd up this long. She didnt know how she ended up laying down, but she couldnt stay awake any longer.  
  
He saw her laying down and didnt know if she was sleeping or still fighting it.  
  
"Ginny?"  
  
Draco walked over and saw she was asleep. He took off her shoes and robe, and set them on the desk by the back door. He pulled down the covers and slid her underneath them as not to wake her up.  
  
Draco knew he shouldnt stay in the same bed with her, so he grabbed two of the pillows and an extra blanket from under his bed and layed down on the floor,a nd fell asleep. 


	17. Wandering

Ginny rolled over and hugged the covers. Her hair was all messed up, and one leg hanging off the bed. She slowly opened her eyes, and was wondering if she was still dreaming.   
  
'Where am I?'   
  
She remembered everything that happened the night before, and she picked up her head, and dropped it back on the pillow.   
  
'Why does this happen to be happening? I don't want to go to class, ever again. Too tired, to weirded out too...'   
  
Ginny heard some rustling and looked over the side of the bed. With just her eyes over the edge, she looked at a sleeping Draco. She smiled and moved some hair out of her face that was blocking her view.   
  
She looked over to the dresser, and saw her robe neatly folded, and her shoes tucked away underneath. She walked over and lifted her robes up ad something fell out... the note he gave her that one night when they all wanted to know about Draco and what was going on. She stormed up to bed so quickly, she didn't bother to read it. Ginny blocked everything out from her mind that night.   
  
She picked up the note from the floor, and walked back to Draco's bed to open it.   
  
'Hey Gin ( Gin? He's calling me Gin?) i know we haven't been able to talk lately because of all that has been going on. I would first like to apologize for all my immaturity over the years. I know its not going to help to say it now, because i just might do it again. Well, i know I'm going to do it again. So anyway, if you ever need to talk, about anything thats been going on, meet me in the Hidden Tower. No one goes up there anymore, but if anyone cant find me, I'm there every night until pretty late. I included a map of how to get there.'   
  
She folded the note up and suck it in one of her pockets. She got dressed, and headed for the way of the back door. Which she noticed was cleared of all the junk that was there yesterday.   
  
Ginny slipped out of the door, and went down the stairs.   
  
@~~@~~@~~@~~@   
  
"We need to talk to Ginny. Somethings wrong. We cant just let her get away with everything like last time. Who knows what Draco is doing to her."   
  
"What do you mean by 'doing to her' Mione? Do you know something we don't? Because if you do, me and Harry would like to know."   
  
"Calm down, I'm just saying Draco isn't one to be trusted. I'm worried for her. And if we are going to...well...be together, i want to have a relationship with her as well as the rest of your family. I don't know what to do."   
  
"She's Ginny. Shes always going to be like this. We should just drop it and leave her. Shes a psycho, mum even said so one time."   
  
"Ain't that the truth."   
  
"Harry! Ron! Come on now."   
  
@~~@~~@~~@~~@   
  
Ginny stood at the bottom of the stairs. She didn't want to move, but she knew she had to. She just pushed herself to start walking.   
  
Ginny dropped her head and stroll the hallways. Left, right, right, straight, up left....   
  
It was surprising she even knew where she was going anymore. Right, right, left...   
  
"Stop THERE Missy."   
  
a/n sorry its been a little bit and that ive been putting up some short chapters lately. but i might not get to update again for about another week. sum stuff has been happening. thank you all so much for your support and kindness. i hope you all keep reading and I'll see you in about a week! and a special thanks to Bri, who posted my chapter today. 


	18. First Kiss

A/N For this chapter, if you want and/or can, download 'Love Song' from 311 and play it at the cue to enhance the story, it will say when. Thanks!  
  
"Hey guys, what's going on?"  
  
"Just looking for you, for what seems like days! Where have you been?"  
  
She was happy it was only her friends. Well, the people she sort of trusted and hung out with.  
  
Amille just raised an eyebrow and shook her head.  
  
"Just...around. You know."  
  
"Well rumors are flying around the school, and not about the normal people you would usually suspect. Its about you!"  
  
"Me?"  
  
"Yes you. I've been worried, you know?"  
  
"Yea, I know."  
  
"Ok well I don't wanna grill you for anything. Just play it safe, ok? We don't really know how this new Draco acts. He's just...confusing."  
  
"Thanks for the concern, but I'll be ok."  
  
Luna came up and hugged Ginny. Although neither of them were really into hugging.  
  
They both started walking their separate ways. She could hear them whisper to each other, but she paid no mind.  
  
Ginny reached into her pocket to make sure it was there. She gripped it tightly and pulled it out. Ginny looked once more at the map.  
  
' Ok, so im here, and it should be...'  
  
She followed the trail with her finger from where she was, to the Tower.  
  
'Not to far from here.'  
  
She began walking, right passed the portrait of the raven and down a long and dark hallway. She walked slowly as not to draw attention. Ginny squinted her eyes; it looked like a dead end. She walked strait to the end of the hallway and stopped.  
  
'There's supposed to be a staircase here. I wonder if this is just a joke or something.'  
  
She went to put her head on the wall and fell right through. She caught herself and looked up. The staircase.  
  
"Wow. Neat-o."  
  
Ginny looked back at where she had fallen through. She could see out at the people walking by the hallway. Disregarding its presence as if it wasn't there at all.  
  
Ginny turned back around at the poorly lit staircase, and traveled up them as fast as she could. When she got to the top, the torches lit up one by one. She looked at this room, and wondered why she like the others, had just passed by the hallway leading to this room.  
  
There were chairs, a fireplace, a window, a couch, and a small table above a rug. It wasn't too big of a room, but it wasn't small.  
  
She walked over to the window and gazed out. It was only about 3:00 so the kids and teachers were still outside. She looked at them all and felt like a little kid at Christmas. It was a hideaway from all of the disruption in her life. A place to hide.  
  
Ginny walked over to one of the chairs and heard the floor clank as two stone pieces being pushed together. She lifted up the rug and found a broken stone piece. Ginny pulled out her wand to fix it, but an idea came to mind.  
  
She lifted the stone and found a hole with a small tattered box inside. She sat down and lifted it out of the floor. It was empty except for a few blank parchments and some dust. She looked them over front to back. Ginny pulled out her wand and said, "Reveal your secrets". Nothing.  
  
She smiled and imagined what she could put into there. A secret room, a secret stash, secret. Draco knew about one, but now she really had something for herself. Things were working out for once. She looked around the room and it felt like home.  
  
She situated the rocks back in place and laid down on the couch. Gazing out of the window, her eyes opened and shut before she fell asleep.  
  
"Sex, love and...rock and roll baby!"  
  
"Oh Draco...hehehe."  
  
"Oh my god...ummm, not here."  
  
"Why? Its perfect! No one is here but... Draco who's that girl over there? HUH? I told you im not into that. Take me out now!" "Melissa, I..."  
  
"Hurry up, I want out."  
  
Ginny lied awake with her eyes closed, so he would still think she was asleep.  
  
"Fine, close your eyes again so I can take you out."  
  
"Grrr, why does this have to be so difficult? Goodbye Draco!"  
  
She could hear the girl storm down the hall.  
  
"Its not like we were together anyway!" "Psshh."  
  
"Wait!"  
  
Ginny got up and looked around. It was dark outside, so she figured she had slept the day away. She rubbed her eyes and began walking down the stairs.  
  
(This is the cue to play the song if you took the time)  
  
Ginny tied her hair back in the rubber band she had since she was 10.  
  
She made her way down the hall. Winding and turning. Things were so dark. Hey, to her it was like walking in everyday life. No questions, just darkness.  
  
She turned the corner and heard footsteps. She backed up against the wall and peeked over the armor to see who it was. Harry had backed up against the wall and had whipped something out of his pocket, and flipped it up and down in the air. Ginny knew this was familiar.  
  
With little moonlight she had, she crept closet to see what he was holding. Her foot got caught on the armor and it made a noise. Harry just glanced over and went back to doing whatever he was doing.  
  
Ginny's heart began to race. Something inside her built up again. Her breaths quickened and her world began to slow. She felt her heart beat faster and faster and remembered the old days when she was in love. How she had to put up with knowing she could never have. Her back was against the armor and the wall.  
  
She turned around the corner to see him, he had disappeared. She walked out and she squinted but she couldn't see him.  
  
"Looking for me Gin?"  
  
"Uhh...umm..."  
  
He slipped something back into his pocket. She snagged a glance and her eyes widened. She looked up into his moonlight eyes and she couldn't think of all the bad he had done to her. She melted in his eyes and then realized what she was doing and looked down, seeing his arm. Freshly cut wounds. Ginny's heart beat faster than ever.  
  
"Yea, I can't help it."  
  
"I know the feeling, its mutual...Harry."  
  
She couldn't believe she was having this conversation with him.  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
She lifted her arm into his view.  
  
"Oh. This is more of a muggle thing. Kind of odd that wizards and witches would do it."  
  
"Im not like them."  
  
"I know."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Just...just shut up Ginny."  
  
He held her face and kissed her. She could feel the coldness of his arms and she didn't know what was going on. She wanted this. She got into it and they both held each other. She opened her eyes for just one second and looked at his face.  
  
'I cant believe he wants to kiss me! Cant think now...defiantly cant think now... im not like the other girls...im no wear near as pretty...ive gone mad, im still dreaming...yes that's it.'  
  
She didn't know really what she was doing. But she tried. Just going by what she had seen. Their bodies drew closer, and the kisses more intense. Harry held her with one arm on her back and one on her neck. She was stable right there. It seemed like a million years and she didn't care at all. His body was warm and his arms were cold. She could barley breathe let alone move. She was mesmerized. Frozen in time. Their lips parted and they stared at each other.  
  
He let go of her and she felt dizzy. Him holding her up was the only way for her not to fall down. Her knees gave out and she looked up, embarrassed. He stretched out his arm, his strong, cut up arm. It looked absolutely beautiful.  
  
She grabbed hold and he chuckled. She folded her arms and tucked her hair behind her ear. He pulled her arm back out and kissed her scars, and then he rubbed some of his blood onto her wrist.  
  
He came up next to her and whispered "Until next time." And walked down the corridor. Ginny slipped to her knees and began to cry. This was all great until it had to be taken away. Her tears hit the floor. She felt she had done something wrong but she had done something right too. She saw one of her tears hit her wrist where he had left his mark. The two mixed together even though they were both so different... 


	19. Whisper sweet nothings into my open woun...

A/N Thanks for the nice reviews. I finally got the nicer version of Microsoft Word. So I can spell check things now. Aren't you all SOO happy? Heh. And I got a new computer to take back with me to my house. There will be more updates and less spelling errors. Especially now that there is more order in my life. Not to say that everything is great but it's a lot better. This is a long chapter but I hope you like it. REVIEW! Thnx.  
  
She sat there on the floor, staring at it. It looked like she had done it. She wanted to keep it. The tear and the blood, so she rushed down the dark hallways to get to her room. She held her wrist up so the tear wouldn't fall.  
  
Ginny looked around corners but didn't see anyone in sight. She ran up to the Gryffindor portrait and murmured the password. She took off her shoes, as not to make any noise, and climbed upstairs to her age-grouped room.  
  
Ginny looked at all the girls asleep in their beds. She too was very tired. But she needed to do this now. Before she forgot it. Ginny lifted up the top of her trunk, and pulled out a very small vile with a cork top. She had fairy dust in this as a child, but had used it up when playing. She put the vile up to her wrist and let the teardrop fall in, and she scraped her wrist of the blood that Harry had left there. It filled up about a quarter of the way, and it began to light up, she held it in her hand so it wouldn't wake up the others. It glowed red and a puff a smoke filled the air.  
  
'I guess there was a tiny bit left.'  
  
She put the vile next to her knife in the cloth and climbed into bed.  
  
Ginny pulled off her robes under the covers and threw it to the side. She sat awake for one last minute, listening to the wolves outside and thinking of what happened. She drifted off to sleep, wondering what the next day would bring.  
  
/=======/  
  
Draco tossed and turned. What had he just seen? Why did he care? All he remembers is that Ginny was too close to that...thing. Too close to the man he hated most. This wasn't a sisterly protection because he would know the difference. It was almost like... could he say it? Jealous.  
  
In his mind it played over and over. Him leaning toward her. Her leaning toward him. He had to do something about it.  
  
He sat up on his bed forcefully and put a science spell on the room. He screamed at the top of his lungs "I do not care for Ginny Weasly. I do not I do not I do not!'  
  
Draco threw himself back onto the bed and grabbed his knife.  
  
/=======/ Ginny woke up the happiest person alive. She was beaming to the brim of her nose. Should she feel this way? It was half past noon. She slept in way late. She didn't care. She was happy. And for once it was an everlasting happiness. Not temporary joy. How could she get over the fact that she had been kissed?  
  
Ginny jumped out of bed with her fellow roommates looking at her weirdly. She did not push her way to the bathroom, she was patient and nothing bothered her in the slightest. She got her wish. Something in her life went so right.  
  
Ginny grabbed the vile of blood and put it around a chain and stuck it around her neck. She made sure it stood out so again she wore all black and pulled it around her neck. Ginny put her hair back with a rubber band she had into a ponytail.  
  
All the girls started whispering and saying things behind her back. She held onto her necklace the whole way out and down the stairs. Kids were running around and talking but still seemed to notice Ginny. Her newfound confidence blinded her. She wasn't aware of her stalkers.  
  
"Look Ron, there she is. Lets go!"  
  
Harry grabbed Hermiones arm.  
  
"What gives Harry?"  
  
"Don't you see her?"  
  
"Yes, and why do you think I am directing you TOWARD her? Did you ever give that a thought?"  
  
"No, don't you really see her?"  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"She's happy."  
  
"So, what better time than now, look she's leaving."  
  
"This sort of subject tends to bring people down, I think we should let her be. Don't ever bring it up."  
  
"What ARE you saying? We just leave her to kill herself?"  
  
"You don't know if she's suicidal. This is Ginny."  
  
"I guess. But we can't ignore it forever."  
  
"Just suppress it for now."  
  
"Why do you care so much all of the sudden, I think...Harry? Where did you go?"  
  
He had disappeared. No were in Hermione's sight.  
  
/=======/  
  
Ginny walked to the secret room to gloat. She sat on the same couch that started it all. She could see out the window at all the students enjoying their spring vacation.  
  
Draco watched her beam with overwhelming joy. He watched as she looked in her pocket of the note she had taken in a class earlier in the week for memory spells. He watched her conjure up one. It was a fuzzy picture of her and Harry. He turned away. He didn't need to see more than he did last night. Draco remembered the spells he learned from Death Eater training. He thought he wouldn't use them on anyone but this was the time.  
  
Ginny's spell vanished and she felt a presence behind her. She looked up and Draco. He had his hands on both sides of her head, and she felt like she was loosing control.  
  
He had used a spell to tap into her mind.  
  
Ginny fell into a sleep and he touched her head. He watched every bad dream she had ever had. She whimpered in her sleep. She didn't know he was at the side of every dream. He looked at her with those rain cloud eyes. He wanted to help, so he created a dream of his own.  
  
Ginny would control herself in this dream. It was her memory of Harry. She knew this because she started out the same.  
  
'I'm dreaming. But how do I know? Cool! I can do things I normally cant.'  
  
She thought of Hermione and she proofed in.  
  
"Ginny we need to talk! Come here!"  
  
"Go to hell Hermione!"  
  
Then she disappeared.  
  
Ginny followed the lights of the torches to where Harry was. Or, where he should have been. She tried to think him into her dream, but it didn't work.  
  
"Looking for me?"  
  
"Oh Harry!"  
  
She turned around to find Draco standing there.  
  
"Your not supposed to be here."  
  
"Is this what you wanted?"  
  
He leaned in and kissed her forcefully but she didn't back out. He pushed up against her, she had to admit, it was a lot more passionate than Harry's.  
  
Draco held her tighter as if she was going to fall. She was almost suffocating against him, but she couldn't have breathed either way. Her arms were on his shoulder because she wasn't expecting this.  
  
He let go of her mouth but not her body.  
  
"Tell me Ginny."  
  
"Tell you what?"  
  
"Tell me you felt that. Tell me I was better."  
  
"What?"  
  
"I saw you and Harry, I can't stand it."  
  
"Ok now I know this is a dream."  
  
"Its real Gin. I can't explain it to you in words. So I thought better in some sort of action."  
  
"Time to wake up Ginny, time to wake on wake yourself up!"  
  
Ginny squinted her eyes and tried to wake up. It didn't work. She wasn't in a real dream. Just a mind alter. He makes what he wants, and so does she. With the exception of the person in charge, they get the most overall control.  
  
Draco turned away. He kissed her again aggressively and very rough as if he was trying to make his face fit in her mouth.  
  
"Stop stop I cant take it. I'm sleeping. Its not real."  
  
"Don't be so sure."  
  
Ginny looked puzzled. Ginny opened her eyes to find Draco above her on the couch kissing her. She put her arms around his neck and kissed him back. This time not caring how well she was doing, but by going on reflex. He lifted himself up on to his palms for more support. She felt his body but she couldn't believe this was all real. He lifted up for one second to look at her. They both took a breath.  
  
"Ginny, I..." he moved his hands down to her hips and she pushed him off.  
  
"Ginny wait please!"  
  
She put her robes back on and went to leave.  
  
"I see how it is, you couldn't find anyone so you had to choose me. Well this isn't going to happen. Well what you think was going to happen."  
  
He grabbed Ginny's shirt and pulled toward him and held her tight.  
  
"Let me go!" She squirmed and couldn't get out.  
  
"Say it."  
  
"NO! Never!"  
  
He let go and she ran down the stairs crying and out of the room.  
  
Draco looked down at one of the steps and saw a broken chain with a pendent with a red liquid inside. He lifted it up and it glowed. He looked out where she had ran away and then stuck the pendant in his pocket. Still grasping it and breathing hard. 


	20. Pictures of You

Ginny ran all the way back to the portrait crying. How could he use her like this? Why would anyone anyway? Was she just too weak to fight off anyone or any emotion? She was feeling so many things right now she didn't know what to do.  
  
She entered into the common room. Harry had fallen asleep on the couch. Ginny stood against the portrait. Watching the fire reflect in his glasses. He was holding a book and still had his robes on. She wanted to know, just how much he had done it. She just couldn't resist.  
  
Ginny walked slowly up to the couch and leaned over him. She lifted up his arm sleeves, and by the dim light she saw the scars. Some were purple and some were white. Some were red and others were pink. She put her hands on them and it felt like her hand was on fire. Harry moaned in his sleep and pulled his arm away. Apparently she grabbed one of the newest ones.  
  
Ginny watched as his eyes slowly opened. She backed up and tripped over the table.  
  
"Ginny you okay?"  
  
"Fine, yes I'm just...perfect."  
  
She dusted herself off and got back up.  
  
"Why are your eyes so red?"  
  
Ginny looked down at the ground and noticed it was gone.  
  
"Where...did it go?"  
  
"What? Where did what go?"  
  
"My necklace."  
  
"What necklace? I've never seen one on you before."  
  
"Well, uhh, I just got it yesterday so. You might have not noticed it."  
  
"Oh. What were you doing anyway? Trying to sneak a peak at something?"  
  
"You sick perv no!"  
  
She hit him on the shoulder and he began to laugh.  
  
"I'm only joking. But seriously what were you doing?"  
  
"I was just umm. Well..." Harry noticed his arm sleeve pulled up.  
  
"Oh that. Yes well, now that you've seen mine, you have to let me see yours."  
  
"Fine, whatever sparks your wand Potter."  
  
Ginny lifted up her sleeve, exposing all her secrets.  
  
"Hmm. The ones that go straight across are the ones you did when you weren't that angry."  
  
He went across all of the ones with his finger, pointing out what he was talking about.  
  
"The ones that go diagonal are the ones you did when you were most angry. And the ones that are plural and together are the ones you did when you were sad."  
  
"How do you know all this?"  
  
"Good experience I guess. Was I right?"  
  
"Yep."  
  
"Hmm. Okay well I better get back to bed. This time in my room."  
  
"Harry wait. I just wanted to know. You know, about that night?"  
  
He turned around and had a smile on his face.  
  
"Yea, what about it?"  
  
"I was just confused is all."  
  
"What is there to be confused about? I kissed you and you didn't stop me. So we just...kissed. Its not that hard to grasp is it?"  
  
"But why me?"  
  
"Because I wanted to know what it was like."  
  
"What it was like? You've kissed plenty of other girls! What are you talking about?"  
  
"What it was like to kiss my own kind. G'night Gin."  
  
"Wait!"  
  
"No Ginny, not today. Go to sleep."  
  
She was left standing there as she watched him go up the stairs. Ginny wished she could have followed him, but her legs wouldn't move. She just stared into a black hole for a moment, then shook herself back to reality. She looked down and had seen the book Harry was holding.  
  
Ginny looked all around for a title but there was nothing. She opened it up and looked at the pages, blank. She tried 3 different spells to make the words appear, but nothing happened. She touched the pages with her hand and saw the lettering on the first page.  
  
'This may be viewed by the souls left in the dark. If you can read this, view on.'  
  
Ginny took the book upstairs and to her bed and opened it. She held her finger on the edge of the pages and pictures appeared. They were of people and things. Some were just random. There were ones of his friends and quidditch fields. Some were funny pictures of teachers like Snape with funny faces and girl clothes. She laughed and turned the pages as she red his feelings through pictures.  
  
She turned one more page, and saw an odd picture. Her eyes widened and she turned the page again. It was the same person. Next page, same person, different pose. How did he get these pictures? Was he watching that closely? These were all pictures of Ginny. 


	21. Moonstone

Ginny stared in wonder at what she had found. One was of her sitting at lunch with her head resting on her hand, one was of her laughing with her friends from last year, and some were of her in clothes she had never seen before.  
  
She didn't know if she should be mad or happy about this. Ginny just did know what to think. She kept flipping through the pages, looking at al these pictures of her. They went from when she was happy to being dressed up in dark dresses and in really dark make-up. She had never dressed like that once in her life. The pictures were in black and white, but had so much color.  
  
When he drew these, did he have feelings for her? Ginny had so many questions that were left un-answered.  
  
'Why did he make me go through all of that? If he liked me, how come he had to torture me? He made me think I was worthless to him all this time! Now, he's worthless to me.'  
  
Ginny's mind was clouded and she felt dizzy. She could barley focus on the thin gin front of her. She thought about all those times she told herself that Harry didn't think of her, that no one thought of her or even pay her any mind.  
  
Ginny grabbed the book and stomped downstairs. She hadn't had a clue what she was going to do, but she just went where her feet took her. By the lights of the torches, she ran quicker and quicker down the hall to the door leading to the outside. While running the pictures grew in her mind of the old times. He had come to save her, he gave her more attention her family had given her then he took it all away. She pushed it open and saw the lake. Ginny knew exactly what to do.  
  
By the time Ginny had reached the lake, she looked at book one more time, and thought about the last thing he had taken away from her. The chance at a first kiss with someone she truly cared about. Not and imaginary person she had locked deep within her heart from what seemed like decades ago. Ginny didn't even think twice about what she was going to do. She lifted up the book and threw it as hard as she could into the lake.  
  
She dropped to her knees and tried to breathe as much air in as she could. For something one could do normally, she was having quite a hard time doing it.  
  
She looked out at the forest and saw the thing that reminded her Draco.  
  
'You've killed a part of yourself.'  
  
Draco. Just the mere name brought even more anger to the surface. It ringed in her head as she watched the creatures walk around the outside of the forest. They did quite resemble horses. But they weren't truly. Like she, looked like a normal human being, bust wasn't truly.  
  
Ginny sat there looking at them flying up in the air and landing back down. She watched them race down the riverside. She wondered if she too could find a pack of her own. )-()-()-()-()-(  
  
Draco watched her throw that book into the lake. He watched from one of the windows of his room. He knew what she was staring at. All he saw was a blob of her but he knew distinctly it was she. Just the way her hair looked and her clothes. He knew.  
  
Meanwhile on Ginny's way back up to her room, she saw the shadow on the wall and turned to see Draco with something hanging from his hand.  
  
"Here I fixed it."  
  
He put it in her hand and before she could say 'thank you' he was already walking down the hall. Although would she really had said it? The chain was now not a cheap one, but it was linked together with moonstone and the pendant hung more loosely off of the chain. She looked down at the charm and it was now fuller. She figured it could only be because of one reason. Ginny smiled and thought it was nice to have done this. It looked a lot better and she felt a little happier about her day.  
  
She was still a little mad about all of the situations, but figured if she could forgive anyone right now, it was Draco. He had been the one protecting her. But very recent occasions might have proved him otherwise. She had an idea and turned around down the hallway.  
  
She turned the corners as quick as she could to find out where he had gone. He was at his secret passageway leading into his private room. She caught up to him just in time.  
  
"Draco wait!"  
  
He saw Ginny run up to him and wondered what she wanted.  
  
"Can I come in?" 


	22. An!

As you all know, I have not been updating as of late. I hope you all can be patient, considering I've made you wait and practically every chapter. And now since school, there is even more time taken out of my day, and that means less writing. I wrote one big chapter and split it into the last 3. All I can tell you now, is that the new chapter will be called "Her Skeleton" and it will be up by next week, Sept. 23. Just one week from now. Thank you for your prolonged patience, and much support.

- BNG


	23. Her Skeleton

"Umm, sure...no problem."

Ginny pushed passed him and ran up the stairs.

"Look Draco, I'm really sorry, I've just been so frustrated lately. Everything is still but my head is spinning widely, my grades have been dropping, I don't know, I don't know!!!"

"Calm down Ginny!"

She buried her face in his robes, for a second she didn't care, than she realized what she was doing and turned around.

Draco was in shock; he didn't know what to do. He was frozen in time, his arms still slightly up in the air. No one really turned to him for any sort of comfort.

This felt sort of strange.

He hadn't felt love before...

Neither had she...

He had many girls to pretend to fill the void. But she usually kept to herself.

They both were quiet for a long period of time, until Draco finally moved from his spot to brush his hair back with his hand.

"Uhh...yeah...eh hem."

Was all he could say at the moment. He was known to be a smooth talker, but his mind was empty except for the thought of her.

Ginny was afraid, she never knew what it was like when someone had a crush on her, so she always was very shy. Right now, was no exception.

He hesitantly put his hand on her shoulder, and surprising to him she put her hand on his and turned around. She didn't want to loose something special again.

Draco pulled Ginny into his arms and held her. She liked being lost in his robes. She felt like nothing could hurt her there. His body was very warm, compared to hers, which made Draco flinch a little.

Ginny could feel her tears run down her face, she couldn't hold them back. They were just flowing without reason. Draco looked down and held her face in his hands and wiped the tears from her cheeks.

Neither of them remembered how to move, or breathe for that matter. They both had a funny feeling, and stopped paying attention to each other, and more on their surroundings.

The torches in the room sated swaying and a strange breeze blew the lights out. Draco held Ginny at his side and lit his wand, and looked around the room. He saw the door open and in one motion moved Ginny behind him and whipped out his wand.

It was just a teacher who came to say to the dorm there was magic build up that cause the weird reaction, and to say in the common room until further investigation. Draco shook his head, and the Professor closed the door.

"Wow that was kinda scary." Draco looked at Ginny who hadn't spoken since she got up to his room.

"Yeah."

"Its dark..."  
  
"Yeah..."

She knew he couldn't see her, she made a funny face because it seemed as though he was embarrassed about guarding her.

She sort of giggled, and he must have heard her because he grabbed her and picked her up.

"You want something to giggle about do you? DO YOU THEN?"

He walked over to his bed and plopped her down on the bed and tickled her.

"No, no, stop! Really, don't..."Draco than looked down at her they had been in this situation before, and she didn't like it, so he laid down next to her on the bed.

"Its kind of cold...no?"

Ginny looked at Draco, thinking of something to respond to what he just said. They could she shadows of the other person, but they couldn't see details.

"You there Gin?"

"Umm, yeah. Cold."

He lifted up the blanket and she crawled under.

'So let me get this strait. I'm with a guy...in his bed... under the covers...in complete darkness.'

Ginny's mind contemplated what to do next. She could hear his breath, and neither of them was tired; she had to find a way to pass the time.

'I could take advantage of this.'

Ginny thought jokingly.

Or so she THOUGHT she thought.

"What?" Draco said laughing.

Ginny's face turned red, though no one could see it.

So she bravely turn around...

"What I said was...I could take advantage of this."

"Really?"

"Yes really."

She rolled over on top of him and kissed him.

"What do you think of that 'Snake Boy'."  
  
"? Well, this is what I think...'Lioness'"

They weren't even 'officially' together, and they already had pet names for each other...almost literally.

He rolled her back over and pinned her hands above her head. She could see the slight glare from his eyes. They started kissing for what seemed like forever. He took his hands off hers, and slipped off his robes and his t-shirt and tossed it across the room. Ginny took her robes off and couldn't help but reach up and feel his abs. This was all to good to be true for her.

"Stop that tickles."

She moved his hands up to his neck, and felt a chain hanging down with tags on the end.

"What's that?"

"Nothing."

He took it off and tossed it to the side of the bed.

Ginny's mind flushed from all thoughts so she didn't know what to think or do. He reached down and went to unbutton her shirt.

"Is this okay?"

A/n HAHA I think I left a cliffhanger. Guess I updated sooner than I thought. So maybe I'll be updating again soon. Again by the same date as this one was supposed to be due by. Review please!


	24. Her Everything

"Listen...I know...it's just..."

"Just what?"

Ginny had to think for a moment. She didn't know if this opportunity would come along again. But Ginny, being a virgin, didn't want to put out with just some guy.

'Wait just some guy? Five minutes ago you liked him...now he's just some guy?'

"Ginny?"

"Yeah...its fine..."

Her mind wandered. She felt distant and distracted. Even though she had said yes, she couldn't decide weather or not it was 'fine'. She felt lost. This was unfamiliar territory. Did she have to go on like this? It did...

Ginny was tired of feeling alone. Maybe this was going to make it all better. Maybe it would cure her disease. But was it really love?

Ginny pushed her mind aside, and departed herself from reality. She had just realized he had already taken off her shirt; she was too numb to decipher any kind of contact with her skin.

Draco ran his hands over her arms, feeling the old wounds. He slid off her pants, and too felt the wounds as his thumb glided along her thigh. He thought of what his father would think. Ha. His father...

He would be furious. But if only he could get to know her. It wouldn't matter to him at all. His mother would be happy he finally found someone. But if needed, he would run away with her. Wherever they would want to go.

He knew she wouldn't do anything special with him today. He just guessed she hadn't had any experience. Not like the other girls. But somehow it felt more special. He didn't need her to do anything special anyway.

Draco could feel the old tattered bra. It wasn't as big as most of his past experiences...but she was perfect in his eyes. His father tortured her mind, her mind, ruined her body with scars. It made him angry, but all he could show now was love.

He kissed her, and he could still taste the salt of her tears. He wanted to make her see how wonderful she really was. He got his frustration out on the Weasley's like his father, but now wished he could take it all back.

Somehow his hands had made it down to where their lives would change forever. He removed her underwear, and Ginny squinted.

She knew soon, it would be too late to go back. It was as it were in slow motion as Draco removed the last of his clothing and moved over her. She bit her lip as she heard Draco say the first thing since the beginning of all this...

"Ready?" He whispered.

"As much as I'll ever be."

He knew she was nervous, so he tried to make the hardest part quick. And in just 2 seconds, Ginny had given the one most prized possession to a Malfoy. The son of the man who despised her family, sacrificed her body. And now for another time, her body was sacrificed.

She endured the pain, but held her keep.

It was finished...over. They both were breathing heavily. He lay down next to her, and Ginny curled up next to him. He wrapped his arm around her and went to sleep.

Two tears streamed down Ginny's cheek. Hoping those were her last two for a long time, she turned around to face Draco and held onto him tight.

It was hard to think; just 25 minutes ago she was running up to Draco to ask for forgiveness. Now they were here. She smiled moved her hair out of her face. With one last look at Draco's shadow, she fell asleep.

Her skeleton, her mind, her body, will lay in Draco's possession. Forever...

A/N The next one should be up soon. I hope you all are enjoying the story, please keep reviewing! Thank you!


	25. Anything for You

a/n Nice long chapter for you guys! looking for microsoft word as we speak! got a virus on my computer so i had to renew everything on my comp. I will revise most of the chapters and this one when i get a chance so theres not so many spelling errors and such that annoy people. )

Ginny awoke the next morning. Still feeling weak.

Draco was still sound asleep. She slid under his arm and moved out from under him. She grabbed her clothes and dressed as fast as she could. Ginny didn't want to be there when he woke. Just for some odd reason it felt wrong. She wanted to see him later...just now right now.

After sliding her robes on and tieing her hair back, she had one last look at what had happened the night before.

She felt so different walking those steps as a brand new person. She stepped out into the hallway, looking around. Kids pointing and whispering. Ginny really didn't care this time. She just smiled and waved.

She inched up her sock and moved along. Ginny didn't feel one bit scared to walk past people with confidence. It was a brand new feeling.

She made her way up to the portrait, and said 'Fikled Fig' and entered into the room.

People stopped and stared at her as the portrait swung open, wondering what was different. Harry watched her like a hawk from the back of the room. He saw her smile and put a loose hair behind her ear. Harry closed his book and dissapeared from the crowed.

Ginny couldnt explain it, but she felt happy. She felt a little older and more mature. Just that little thing that happend, made a world of difference. Her life was somewhat clear now.

She felt like she was free, like her mind was cleared. She didnt have a grudge in the world. Just than she felt a tap on her arm. She swirled around afraid of who it might be.

Ginny grasped her robes,

"Harry, its just you, I..."

"How does it feel?"

"What do you mean?"

Ginny cleared her throat and looked down at the ground, afraid to look into his now peircing green eyes.

"I saw you visited Draco..."  
  
She was still silent.

"Yea so what?"

She threw her robes on the floor and went to the bathroom.

Ginny just looked in the mirror at herself and the Harry not to far behind her.

"I hope your happy. Enjoy it while it lasts."

He sounded sincere but there was something about his voice that told Ginny otherwise.  
  
She sighed and glanced down for one second.

"Listen, Harry, your not my keeper..."

He was gone.

Ginny rolled her eyes and made her way back to her bed. She opend up her trunk to get out some clean clothes. She saw the fake silk cloth and her body stopped one second as her mind started to wonder. The year, starting from the begining, flashed by in her mind in a matter of seconds. Her life as she knew it changed and turned so often, she even didnt know who she was anymore. It had been so different every passing second. From the moment her first cut was made, till last night when she was staring up in Draco's eyes with fear and wanting. All she could remember was his eyes in the dark. He stared right at her the whole time, as if making sure she was okay.

Harry had made her feel kind of bad. But why should she feel bad for him? After all these years. After all she went over to get through this. But the one thing that made her happy could be...steps away. She had to see him again. Even if it only was for one second that made her happy it made her happy and nothing ever did. She was going to see him. She would meet Draco later.

---

A couple days went by, very quickly for Ginny. Teachers leaving notes with Hermione for not going to classes, teachers stopping her in the hall. But there was only one thing she went for...Draco. In the morning, before class, maybe during class, after class...

She would meet him on his Prefect duties or they would ditch class or sneak out of class. They went for Draco's room the most because of the secret passage, but they sometimes went to Ginny's dorm and the Hidden Tower.

Of course Draco wasnt questioning this one bit at all. He was a guy after all, and all he knew in his mind was ' this is fun! '. She didn't know why she wanted it, she just needed it. To keep her happy and her minds uttered words at bay. It made her happy and thats all she knew.

But where had she had this feeling before?

Ginny had forgotten all she was upset about and all that crossed her mind was happiness. She didnt care that she was failing school, she didnt care that teachers wer worried, she didnt care that her mother and father would be most upset...she just didnt care. And why should she have to? It was her life and her rules at Hogwarts. Her Teachers were giving her second chances at many things. So, when there was time for work, which wasnt very often while Draco was still at school, she would do it. This went on for about two weeks untill when one day Ginny shut the door behind her in Draco's room.

"Hey Gin."

"Draco...Whats with the bags?"

"Listen, my fathers hosting the Dark Mark Cerimonies. Vol-... he likes to meet the trainees before it happend. So me and a lot of the Slytherins...well...90 of them...will be going tonight at midnight. We will be back on monday. Its just one weekend Ginny."

She had forgotten he was a Slytherin, along with many things, and this sort of shocked her. She wasnt going to stop him of course, but how would she deal without her happiness beside her at all times.

"Midnight, thats just in a half hour."

"Yea, so lets make this a quick one okay?"

She knew what he was talking about. But she didnt know what to do.

"Ginny? Oh come off it, I'll be back, you will be fine without me."

She wasnt so sure of that.

"Uh, yea, i will."  
  
Ginny smiled a sort of slanted smile and looked over the two bags. What would they be doing for that long?

"So?"

Ginny looked up at Draco.

"No, no...not right now."

"Okay well id better get downstairs. She you when i get back."

He left her with one kiss on the cheek.

His front door closed behind him. He had left. Who was going to take her pain away? She saw a Slytherin scarf of the floor and picked it up. It smelled like him. She folded it up and stuck it in a pocket on the inside of her robes. Ginny exited out the back way when she heard the pop of the Slytherins leave the campus.

Solmnly she walked down the spiral staricase and down the halls toward the Hidden Tower. Again, she turned the corner to find someone unexpected. she turned and tried to walk back as quietly as she could

"Ginny wait."

She squinted her eyes and knew she was cought.

"Yes Harry?"

"Headed somewhere?"

"Uhh, yea, dorms."

She smiled and turned around to face him.

"You know your going the wrong way?"

Ginny laughed a little bit.

"Yea okay im not."

"I know where your going, come on i'll go with you."

Harry hung onto her shoulder and walked through the wall that lead to the room.

"I snuck some butterbeer from the Room of Requirement."

He handed her one and put the rest on the table. She glady opened it up and drank it fast. Although it really didnt have as much of an effect as other types, it took a lot to get someone drunk.

Harry looked at Ginny and knew something was wrong. They got to talking, and a couple tears later, Harry was holding her in his arms. She felt safe there, like with Draco...Draco! She lifted herself up.

"Whats wrong Gin?"

"Nothing, no no im fine....just like he said."

"Who?What?"

"Nothing."

He wasnt here, who was going to comfort her, nothing was working...

Harry moved in and kissed her hard. Ginny didnt do anything. Those feelings fo happiness where comming back, so why stop it? They started to move faster and things around them started to change. Ginny was more fulfilled by this. Someone knew to make her happy. But the next morning, her worst fears and lost dreams would be realized.

She lay on top of her brothers best friend, her first love, her hero, without a trace of clothing.

a.n Oh HAHA the story twists and turns! REVIEW! Or more evil will befall you...hehe j/k...but seriously review!


	26. an ideas? smut? IDK!

A/N Listen, ive had some ideas for the next couple of chapters. Ive been thinking of more smutty-ness. But i want to know if its alright with you guys. I dont know the ages or whatever of the people reading this story, but it is rated R. So anyway, send me your thoughts and i'll try my best to put them into play, thanks and remember to review! More long chapters on the way.


	27. Going Under

Many a spelling error in this one probably. Still waiting to find Word.

Warning to all: Some smut like actions in this chapter, you have ben warned

"Crap...crap...crap..." that was all that went through her mind when she lay there motionless not to wake Harry. She just lifted her head up and looked at him with one arm over his head. His glasses were on the table and their clothes...well they were everywhere. She looked down and reached for her shirt, but she saw her robes lying next to them. She leaned over more and saw the green scarf she had taken from Draco's room. Ginny slid off of Harry, put on her shirt and robes. She held them tight as she looked for her underware and pants. Harry was full-on naked, so she tried not to look at him as she went on her hunt. She didnt even bother to put her bra on because it would have involvd taking her shirt off again. She stuck it in the pocket with the scarf and ran out of the room.

It was still early, so no one was walking anywhere except for a few teachers whom she avoided. She kept asking herself how she could be so stupid and how she could have done that...and many other thoughts that almost brought tears to her eyes.

She made it to where Draco's secret entrance was. She needed to be alone and this was the place where she could be. She ran over to the bad and fell face down on it. She cried her heart out and rememberd what had happend.

"Ginny, Ginny whats wrong?"

"Nothing, just dont stop okay?"

"Okay."

She didnt want to be reminded of who he was, she just wanted comfort.

Their clothes came off in a matter of seconds, and Ginny was on top of Harry, naked.

"Ive never done it like this before...I.."

"Shh, its okay, I'll help."

She felt Harry's cold hands on her hips as he moved her down toward what she had wanted from him a long time ago. She lifted herself up as high as she could and harry moved himself around on the couch so she could put her knees on either side of him. He motioned her hips down. She braced it as she felt him enter her.

He then motioned her hips up and down for a few seconds. Untill she got rythim of it and he felt elsewhere. He felt down her legs and felt her stomach. He felt up and felt her breasts. He felt her go faster and Harry started to get impatient.

"Ginny, oh Merlin Ginny!"

He put his hands back on her hips and held her harder. He pushed her farther down and tried to make her go faster as if he could controll it.

Ginny and Draco usually kept things quiet and was not used to hearing anyone say anything suring sex. Just the occasional moan or two. She never said anything either. But, the thing was, Harry _was_ used to it.

"Ginny, say my name."  
  
Ginny looked a little weirded out by this, but she went a long with it.

"Harry."

"More...more..."

"Harry, Harry, Harry."

"Ginny, im about to...."

"Me too....HARRY!"

"Ginny!"

And that was the end of it. Harry mutterd a birth controll spell as Draco had before, and they fell asleep in eachothers arms.

This was not a happy memmory for Ginny, she felt like hurling but nothing ever happend. It just sat there in the pit of her stomach taunting her to move, to even breathe wrong. His voice rang out in her head, and it wouldnt stop. It just repeated itself on and on and it wouldnt stop. Luckily she was alone. No one could get her in here. She was safe.

Ginny fell asleep on Dracos bed. She kept waking up with nightmares of Harry and her. Why did she have to do it? She just wanted someone to make her happy, not thinking about the consquences it would cause on other people. But in a way she was glad she had gotten Harry out of her system. She wouldnt need him again.

Ginny stayed in Dracos room for the weekend. She had the House Elf get her food and usually ate very little. She didnt want to risk running into Harry. It would make things worse.

Ginny was sleeping when Draco got back. He was glad to have seen her. Even if it was a couple of days, he had missed her very much. He put his bags down and walked over to her on his bed. She was wearing the same thing she had worn before he had left. He thought it to be kind of odd, but he took it in as a compliment. He slowly shook her awake.

"Ginny...Ginny..."

"Hmm"

"Wake up Ginny...Im back."

He went to shake her again and when he touched her she freaked out and moved away. Her heart was racing, she was having another dream.

"Ginny are you okay?"

He saw her eyes were red and swollen and her hair was matted to her face.

"Ginny whats wonrg?"

She looked at him and started crying again. He crawled on the bed and held her as she cried.

"Its okay, i promise."

"No, Draco, no its not." She managed to get out between sbos.

She moved away from him and began to tell him the story.

"Well once we got in there, one thing led to another..."

'Oh Merlin, thats the line...not that line Ginny...please not that line.'

Draco took his hand off of her shoulder and his mouth dropped a little.

"You know what Ginny, its fine."

He said getting up off the bed.

"Its COMPLEATLY fine. We didnt have anything. We were just fuck buddies after all. So theres no point in telling me anymore. Can you get out now please?"

Draco was holding back tears as those cold words hit Ginny as sharply as her own knife.

She sobed louder and tried to lift herself up off the bed.

"OUT PELASE!" Draco yelled once more. Ginny got up off the bed and ran down the staircase and into the hallway. She turned the corner to fast and she fell onto the ground. She couldnt take it. She didnt know what to do, it all had to just go away...

Draco had to take in all she said for a little bit. He reasoned it over in his head while he sat on his bed. He recalled memmories of him and her on the very same bed he was sitting on in the very same room he was told about...Potter.

No matter how tightly he held her, or how tightly they held eachother, he still felt like she was pushing him away. She still felt cold to the touch even if it was warm. She looked so frail and broken, but he could do nothing to put her back together. He would look at her and she would smile, but she was a bad faker. He loved the way she did smile. He loved everything about her. He just couldnt understand why he couldnt hold her; be close to her. She was always so distant and confused. He couldnt do anything but comfort her for that little while in time. Then he thought about it a little bit more, and realized, she was just like him.

He had his girls every night to keep him happy. But none of them could say that he was anybodies. Which was how he liked it. Untill he realized HE couldnt say that he was anybodies. So he understood her actions a little better. Potter was the one that broke her heart, she just needed a peice of him before she could move on. Move on to the one she would love second best, Draco. He was never second to anyone except his father. But he wasnt home, he was at Hogwarts.

But he hurt her so many times, how could she have gone back to that? He hated his father for doing what he did, he may have put up with it but he didnt like it. He had beaten him, left him alone, he just ignored it. Maybe because she had somthing left for him she was ignoring it.

Merlin her hated her right now. He went over and picked up a couple of partchments that he got from his father to read them over and take his mind off it. But he couldnt get through the first line.

Why did she have to go and do it? Why couldnt she have done it before they got together? Although neither of them really announced it, it was understood.

"Damn it Potter!" He yelled, throwing the papers everywhere.

He saw she had left her robes in his room and lifted them up and threw them across the room. His scarf fell out. He was expecting it to clank because of what she usually kept in her pocket.

He suddenly felt his heart skip a beat, his mind began to race.

"Oh shit, Ginny!" Draco yelling, running through the door.

a/n cliff hanger? i'll update sooner if i get more reviews. think its evil? REVIEW and you will get your wish )

and a thank you to all those who reviews last time. i will make a habit of thanking reviewers, because you all make me so happy!

Nickel : well there you have it ) and im glad your sticking around no matter what

little-munchkin-poo : hehe im glad to be back too.

Dark-Dreams-69 : well you can see by the state of this chapter, who she truly loves more.

lemon648 : awsome yay!

theophania : as do we all even though most wont admit! hehe

ignorencereekstruth : ok i will i will! and i did didnt i? hehe

Rebelgal4ever : just got your review a minute ago, and the same comment above applies to you!

THANK YOU GUYS! YAY!


	28. Take Me Away

Ginny walked into the Gryffindor common room, her hands and body were shaking violently. Tears were now streaming down her face, only one thing could make it all better, only one thing could make it go away. She saw Harry sleeping on the couch, and she couldn't help but squeak a little. She slowly walked around him, trying to keep her whimpers hidden.

She walked slowly up the steps to the girls dorm and the door creaked open. She wiped her nose with her hand and walked over to her trunk.

Harry had pretended to be asleep when she walked in. She sounded really upset. He figured it was because of the little rendezvous they had a couple nights back. Had Draco found out? Had he done anything to her? Why could he have let it gone that far? He knew they both needed each other but it was the worst thing either of them could have done. He was the older one, he had initiated it. It was his fault, he would go apologize.

He got up from the couch and made his way up the stairs.

Ginny was in the middle of a cutting fit. She was sitting on her bed, rocking back and fourth. Her arm looked like it had been dipped into a bucket of red paint. She didn't know what she was doing, it was just compulsive. Over and over and over, even cutting over ones that had already been made. They were so deep it had looked like Ginny was mauled by a tiger. But it was her own rage and sorrow that had gotten to her.

Ginny finally made it to the place where she had looked for on her arm. They would understand, they wouldn't care, it had to be done,

Harry pushed open the door and saw Ginny laying on her bed.

"Ginny? Ginny are you awake...Gin I'm sor..."

The moonlight reflected off her very pale face. He touched her forehead, she was so cold. He looked down and saw his knife laying in her flimsy hand and there was so much blood he didn't even know where to begin. He threw off his robes, took off his shirt, and grabbed the knife and began cutting his shirt into tourniquets. He wrapped them tightly around her arms and he too started to shake. He heard her moan and she winced a couple of times, but it had to be done. The whole time he was muttering to himself.

"Damn it Ginny, Damn it Gin..."

He said it at least a thousand times before picking up his robes and wrapping her in them and picking her up.

Draco was running fast paced toward the Gryffindor common rooms. He didn't know how his feet were moving but they were. He had to get there, he knew something bad was going to happen. He was mad at her but he didn't want this to happen to her, not in a million years.

He finally made it there to see Harry holding a limp body. Ginny's hair flowed out from the rest of her body, he knew it was her. No one else had hair like her. Not that he had noticed anyway. He ran toward him, fear and anger in his eyes.

"Potter!" He screamed.

"Draco all things aside right now, we have to get help or shes going to bleed to death!"

Draco's eyes went cold and his body felt weak. He realized his worst fear had come true.

"We cant take her to the Hospital Wing, you know what will happen there. Counseling and her family would get involved, we both knew thats not what she wants or what she needs. No one should have to know."

"Then what the hell do we do? Where the fuck do we go Malfoy shes dieing in my arms as we speak!"

"Come with me, quick Potter!"

They ran to Draco's room, both faster then they have even run before. They traded off at the stairs and Draco ran quick. He laid her down on the bed and unfolded her. Her arms flopped out as if she was a rag doll. She had no expression on her face, it had looked like she was already dead.

Harry comforted her while Draco ran to go look for something to stop the bleeding. He checked to see if she was still breathing, and leaned his head over her mouth. He felt small frantic gasps for air. This was not the Ginny he once knew, full of life and so much more.

The blood had soaked through the shirt strips Harry had cut for her. It was no longer a white shirt but a crimson red one. The blood on her arms matched her hair. It really was a sick sight for the both of them. Draco came out of the bathroom with two potions in hand.

He instructed Harry to lift her up so he could give one to her. He got out his want and pointed it at her throat while he poured the pink liquid into her mouth. He mumbled a spell and it looked as if it had drained into Ginny's body. She was too incoherent to do anything, let alone swallow.

Draco pushed Harry out of the way and began undoing the bandages Harry had tied. Harry was a little unsettled about being pushed out of the way by Malfoy, but he lived with it. Draco poured the other liquid over her arms and it looked like it was bubbling on her arms. It was to stop the bleeding from the source and the other was to stop the bleeding from inside for a small while.

They both stared in wonder at the girl. Sixteen and already half dead, and all they could do was wait, watch, and hope.

Neither of them spoke the rest of the night, and Ginny showed no signs of life. Draco's head was buried in his arms in a chair he pulled up next to the bed. Harry just sat on the floor with his head in one hand. No one had spoken for hours.

"Listen, Potter, i know what happened. And i don't blame her as much as i blame you."

"Malfoy, i didn't follow you up here to fight. I know it was stupid of me, but..."

"But what Potter?" Draco threw a cold glance his way.

"But it was Ginny. Shes yours and i couldn't take the fact that she couldn't be with me for just one day. Thats all i wanted. But I'm not saying I'm done with her for good, I still want a friendship with her if its at all possible."

"Just remember Potter, shes mine. You had your chance and lost it. Don't think you've got another one."

Harry had known this was going to happen, but he hated to talk about it. He didn't have another chance, it was the most truthful thing to have even come out of his mouth. He was also surprised how protective he was of her.

"Ok well i think I'm going to head out. Someones got to be there to make up a story of what happened to her. Take care of her...Draco."

Harry made his way to the back door with one last glance at Ginny.

"Hey Potter..."

Harry turned around and Draco threw him a t-shirt.

"We wouldn't want you running around the school half naked now would we?"

Harry put it on and walked out the door.

"Not even a thank you..."

He sighed and looked down at Ginny.

"Merlin Gin how could this have happened to you?"

Her color returned a little bit and her arms had stopped bleeding so much. After the potion had taken effect he re-wrapped her arm with the same t-shirt Harry had ripped after cleaning them with a spell. He knew she wouldn't wake up anytime soon, but he watched her like she was going to spring awake and any given second. He didn't understand what it was about her that made her so irresistible. She was very beautiful, she had one of those naturally beautiful faces. She had a glow about her that wouldn't quit. It was almost angelic the way she looked. He didn't know the right way to tell her all these things even after all they shared. He wasn't used to this sort of thing, being able to tell people what he felt.

Ginny looked so peaceful and calm it drove him crazy. It was such a state that didn't seem normal. She felt nothing like she looked. She was cold and worn, like she had been left outside during a snow storm. He lifted her up into his arms and held her there for a minute, and then he lifted up the covers and put her under. He couldn't leave her alone, he didn't like her being so far away. He needed her. More then she would ever know.

Draco stayed right in that room with her, not leaving her side more then a minute to go something. It had been a night and a full day before Ginny's eye flickered open in the dark room. Ginny didn't know where she was or what had happened to her.

'Am i dead? Did i do it?'

Her own voice ringer in her head, and it hurt. Everything about her hurt.

Ginny moaned in pain and Draco flew awake.

"Ginny, oh Merlin Ginny are you okay?"

Ginny wanted to answer but she felt sick and weak. She couldn't push herself to go that far.

"Its ok you relax, just tell me if you need anything. I'm going to be right her next to you."

Draco stayed awake the rest of the night. Ginny would say things in her sleep and he would listen intently. It would be soft and quiet, until she got to saying some weird things Draco didn't understand.

"How can you see into my eyes...like open doors. Leading you down into my core, where Ive become so numb. Without a soul, my spirit sleeping somewhere cold...until you find it there and lead it back...home..."

Ginny started to get louder and louder as she sang her song. Draco's eyes were wide open and he held her hand as she went on.

"Wake me up inside, wake me up inside,call my name and save me from the dark.Bid my blood to run, before I come undone, save me from the nothing I've become..."

Draco listened as Ginny sang. He didn't know the Weasley's carried any sort of...pipes. But weather or not they did, hers were good. She actually had a good singing voice. He wonderd why she had never told him this before.

"Now that I know what I'm without,you can't just leave me...breathe into me and make me real, bring me to life..."

She finished her song and Draco looked at her. She had started to wake up.

"Ginny you alright?"

"Mmm hmm. Just..."  
  
"What Gin? What do you need?"

"You."  
  
"I'm here Gin."

"Just hold me..."

Draco scooted himself closer and wrapped his arms as tight as he could around her. She slowly lifted up her arm and put her hand on his. Their fingers intertwined and they both fell asleep.

The next morning Ginny woke up with the light bright in her eyes. She tried to set herself up, but her arms felt like they had bricked tied to them. They were sore and tired.

"Hey Gin, feeling uhh...any better?" Draco said, trying not to bring anything up or make her uncomfortable. Ginny kept her head down and tried again to push herself up. Draco ran over and helped her up. He put a pillow behind her to prop her up.

"Thanks...Draco."

"Feel like you can eat anything?"

"No, but i could use some water."

"Ok, one second."

Draco ran over to a small table with food and cups and grabbed one with water. He felt better knowing she felt better. Her eyes weren't as red, and he could tell that she was avoiding looking at her arms. After a few moments of silence, Draco spoke up and tried to start a conversation.

"Ginny, what is 'wake me up inside?'"

Ginny looked kind of surprised.

"Uh why do you ask?"  
  
"You were singing it in your sleep. 'Wake me up inside, wake me up inside..' Was is a song or...?"

"I heard it on a muggle sound system. It played music. Harry brought one over one summer and i took it in my room. I kept it in my room and i heard it a couple of times and Ive had it stuck in my head ever since."

"Oh. It was a good song. I liked it."

She knew he was dancing around the real subject, and she was glad. She didn't want him to ever get to that. She wanted to forget it ever happened. She wanted to get her wand and erase it from her memory. Just as she was lost in her thoughts, there was a knock at Draco's main door.

A/n Cliff hanger? I dont know, you decide i guess. Now, for the Thanks

Rebelgal4ever - well more cliff hangers to come. it keeps you interested right?

ignorencereekstruth - She was in the Hidden Tower, remember? Hehe

bruised-tears - Yay!

Nickel - Hehe sorry about that.

lemon648 - 150 and MORE reviews...Lets hope we can get there. i would be jumpin for joy.

MadDelinquent - Even though you reviewd for chapter 2, im puttin you here. It was a nice review.

theophania - Well that and that something was going to happen.

SilentBoob - Im sorry you keep dieing over my story...i will seek out help! lol

Dark-Dreams-69 - Ive been trying to update faster, ive had more ideas this month(and more reviews) so ive been writting quicker.

little-munchkin-poo - Like i said before, it makes you wanna read more. And its kinda fun to tease people! Hehe j/k

THANK YOU! And remember, REVIEW!


	29. Beautiful Mine

A/N Hey guys. I wrote a small little Ginny fic when the moment struck me. You can go read it if you want. It was only a one chapter thing. But anyway, here is the chapter that might change your lives FOREVER!!! Okay I'm just joking, but here it is.

Blasie strolled through Draco's door like it was nothing.

"Hey, Draco..."

She stopped and took a second look before walking at a fast pace toward Ginny.

"Oh my...Ginny...I knew you were a cutter but.."

"Stop Blasie...I'll talk to you about it somewhere else..."

Draco grabbed Blasie's arm. Ginny had no expression on her face. It was like there were so many emotions her mind couldn't make up which was to come first. Blasie and Draco walked out of the room and onto the stairs. All she heard was a silencing charm being said and all she had were her own thoughts.

She didn't really believe she went through with it. She never would have thought this to be her fate a year ago...perhaps even a month ago. Silent tears streamed down her face. Her memories passed by her in her brain.

She fell when her dad had brought home 'roller skates' because all the muggle kids had them. Ginny tried them on and went rolling through the house and fell a few times, and her brother Ron would always be there. But then just suddenly, he wasn't. She had no one to hold onto when she was about to fall, or no one to help her when she did. Then Harry Potter came and saved her from everything. That's when that crush developed. He helped her when she needed someone, but then all that went away. Just like her brother had. But instead of forgetting about her, he abused her. Physically and mentally. Why, she would never really know. But she knew all of it wasn't the alcohol.

Then...Hermione. She had tried to help Ginny, but she rejected. She didn't need help though...right? She just wanted more attention. Stupid Hermione, all she wanted was attention!

Ginny's face turned to anger as she remembered how she was caught. How could she have been so careless? It could have been prevented...

Then Draco. He had been the first to find out. But he was just Draco at the time...not the Draco she knew now. He didn't matter back then. But now he mattered so much. He had taken her pain away. Maybe sometimes...in weird ways but he did. But she didn't want to get close to him. But it was too late. Why did she have to get into this? Just so she could be heart broken again? No, this didn't have to happen. She could forget all this happen, and go back to being old Ginny and prove them all right. And it was just a phase. But it wasn't...

She had to pretend. Go back to her original state. Just...pretending and lying and not really being her. She can just be that little girl again who had her hair tied in pigtails or just tied back lazily. She can be that little girl who wished she had said more to Harry Potter at lunch but be to shy at dinner. It was better then being hurt.

She got out of the bed and had to hold herself up, she hadn't gotten up and about for the past 2 days. She just walked for the front door and wouldn't care if someone saw her. Draco would deal, it wasn't her problem. She reached the door knob then heard a voice from behind her.

"Where do you intend on going missy?"

Blasies voice cut off her air supply for a second and all body motion stopped. She opened the door a little more...in hopes of getting courage from it.

"You wont want to step any further."

"Why? Are they going to attack me because I'm Ginny Weasley a mudblood lover? Or are you going to do that yourself?"

"No. I'm just saying. You don't want to. I don't know you very well but..." She sighed and walked over to where Ginny was standing.

"I know you don't want to."

Ginny stopped and looked at her for a second.

"You know your really pretty for a girl who just tried to commit suicide." Blasie put her hand out to move a hair out of Ginny's face. ginny flinched and moved to the side.

"I'm not going to hurt you." Blasie chuckled and moved the hair.

"I can see why he likes you so much. He can hardly eat if people are in the way of your view."

"I'm not pretty."

"Come again Gin?"

"Listen, I'm not pretty, and I'm not for Draco. So let me go ruin my life some more elsewhere."

Blaise shut the door and went to make Draco's bed. She sat down on it and stared at Ginny.

"I'm not stopping you really. Lets just say I'm just helping you in the right direction."

Ginny started walking toward her. Maybe one more minute in this room wasn't so bad.

"Ginny, you ARE pretty. I don't care what you say because your not on the outside. So you ARE pretty. Okay you got that?"

"Sure."

"Okay look. One of my best friends is walking around the school because he hasn't been out of this room for more then one second. Do you know why?"

Ginny looked down.

"Not just that. If you would have gotten a little tiny scrape he would be up here for as long as he has been."

Ginny looked at Blaise while she uttered all these words. 'Blaise had very pretty eyes and long black hair...why was she complimenting me?' Ginny thought to herself.

"And...what Ginny?"

"I can hear you say these things...but somehow I just can't believe them."

"Well, your going to have to sometime. Or you will realize them on your own. Because you really are. You have grown so much Ginny. I have watched you over the years. Draco actually has always had a small thing for you. But he blocked it out."

"How do you know?"

"I'm his best friend. He tells me everything. Even if I would ruin his reputation. he knows he can trust me."

"I've never seen you guys together. Since you guys are best friends and all, wouldn't you be?"

"He has other friends too and his own life. I try to not get too involved because really there are some things I'd rather not know. But every time he talked about you, it interested me. You have made him grow too, even though you may not think it. He grew apart from his fathers ideas and started to gain his own. You, being a Weasley, and him liking you made him grow. You really changed him for the good. And I've been telling him for years to do so and you come along and do it with just one glance."

Blaise started to laugh, and Ginny smiled a bit.

"So he's liked me for a while?"

"Yes, he has. Since about 5th year I think. Wait...he first told me he thought you looked pretty in the middle of fourth year. It was quite a long time ago. He's just good at hiding things and suppressing feelings is all."

"I just don't want to hurt him anymore."

Blasie took in a deep breath and looked at Ginny.

"Listen, he's Draco. He can handle his own. He's known about your liking of Harry Potter as the whole school. You have never 'dated' until Draco. So he understands your little need to expand for a day. Even though, it was something that hurt him deeply. He didn't want to loose you. There's just something about you that makes him soft."

Ginny kind of felt anger towards her. Her 'need to expand' ? What was her right to say that? She had no right...what was her problem? But she did deserve what she had coming to her. Every dripping bit of pain was what she deserved.

Blaise saw the fire in her eyes light up again.

"Go."

"What?"

"Go talk to him. I'm guessing he is back by now."

Blasie walked off and out the front entrance to his room.

Ginny got up and grabbed her wand. She made her way to the back entrance.

Her hair swayed as she made her way down the stairs. Her hand graced the wall. She felt different. Her arms feeling better. Her head feeling cleared. She tapped the wall with her wand.

The door slid open. Draco's face appeared slowly as the door moved aside. His face tilted slightly down. His eyes looked so alive and you could see a sense of wanting in his expression. Ginny looked at her arms, and took off the cut up shirt on her left arm, The shirt fell to the floor. She moved on to the next arm but Draco grabbed her. Ginny's eyes flickered and she looked up. Draco pulled her close and kissed her. Did she deserve him? Did it matter? She had him, and well, she never wanted to let him go.

Ginny held the back of his head as they kissed. Merlin, how did she deserve this? Ginny wanted to be as close as she could, her hips would grind on his. Their foreheads rested on each other as Draco looked down at Ginny.

They both panted, out of breath.

"Ginny..."

"Draco, I have to tell you something."

"Hmm?"

"I...i think i l--"

"You fucking bastard! Get off of her!"

Just then McGonagall and Ron had walked up.

"What the fuck are you doing?"

He pushed Draco violently off her.

"Ronald Weasley control yourself!"

Ginny threw her one uncovered arm back behind her. McGonagall frowned on her. What was going on?

Draco had been pulled away from the heat and comfort of someone he cared for deeply. Who the hell ripped that apart? He wanted to kill the bastard.

Draco jumped up.

"Weasley! You fucking git you bloody bastard, YOU..."

He didn't even bother to finish his sentence, and just punched him as hard as he could in the face.

Ron stumbled backwards and held his nose.

"Stop it now, the both of you!"

McGonagall stepped in the middle of them, Ginny still backed against the wall. Afraid to speak. Her cover was off, she didn't know what to do.

"Ginny, the Headmaster needs to see you. Your mother is here. Don't bother putting robes on Ginny, your mother is here."

Draco's breathing slowed a little bit and he looked at Ginny and McGonagall.

"Why?" Draco said, being protective.

"It's none of your business you git!" Ron shouted as he held his nose still from the bleeding.

"Ronald, you go to the hospital wing while I take your sister up to see your mother."

Ron hesitated, giving one last death glare at him. Draco returned the favor as Ron stomped off in the opposite direction.

Ginny spoke up, her voice a little shaky.

"Wh..y...do I need to see the h-headmaster?"

McGonagall again looked down.

"It is about your arms Miss. Weasley..."

A/N OOOOH. What happens now? Well, you wont be able to find out until you review. I expect 20 at LEAST. Also no time for thanks in this chapter, in too much of a hurry to get it up! But I will say, THANK YOU ALL. Even though I can't do it individually.


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